Michelangelo’s Dream of Robin Hood

August 7, 2020 at 10:51 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was sitting with Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster and watching news footage of a speech George Soros gave at his most recent Davos World Economic Forum private dinner that was held on Thursday January 23rd of this year.

“The man looks like a poster child for demonic possession,” Renfield remarked, “If someone ever wanted a transgendered Linda Blair for a geriatric remake of the 1973 film The Exorcist, then George Soros is definitely the man for the job.”

Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster was already hiding under an artificial shipwreck at the bottom of his aquarium trying hard not to look at the demon possessed Soros.

Turning off the TV, Renfield bid Michelangelo good night and left the Set Enterprises laboratory.

Mounting a plastic mermaid at the bottom of the aquarium, Michelangelo fell asleep.

The lobster dreamed that he was human- Robin Hood in fact.

Good King Richard the Lion Hearted (a man who looked a lot like Renfield) had been taken hostage by an evil Austrian baron (a man who looked a lot like Bill Gates) over on the continent.

The evil Austrian baron was in cahoots with the evil Prince John (a man who looked a lot like George Soros).

Prince John was now ruling the English people as Prince Regent.

He had also unleashed a bubonic plague (bought from a Chinese alchemist named Gin Lu) which allowed him to lock the English people (Anglo-Saxons and Normans alike) in their homes.

The Sheriff of Nottingham (a man who looked like the senility prone Joe Biden) rode his horse backwards all over England to enforce the evil Prince John’s will in between asking “Where am I?” and occasionally stopping to sniff the hair of various women he encountered while riding his horse bassackwards.

Prince John had taken the beautiful Maid Marion (who looked like Rita Hayworth) hostage.

Michelangelo as the dashing Robin Hood (in his human shape, he looked like Gene Kelly) broke in to rescue her.

Having rescued the fair Marion, he turned and there stood the evil Prince John while the senile Sheriff of Nottingham lay on the floor sniffing the fur of chipmunks.

Prince John pointed an arrow at Robin’s heart with a bow, “Good-bye Robin.”

As he fired, the Sheriff of Nottingham stood up to announce, “I just remembered having forgotten where I laid my tiny codpiece this morning where I stand on the issue of human sacrifice. I’m personally opposed but…”

Prince John shot the Sheriff of Nottingham in the buttocks.

The manoevre allowed Robin Hood to grab a sword and behead the evil Prince John

He then kissed the beautiful Maid Marion.

Michelangelo smiled in his sleep.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday August 7th
2020.

Permalink 13 Comments