Putin, Maduro, Vampire Set and Miranda Singh

February 12, 2019 at 11:55 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, International Espionage, International Intrigue, Mystery, News, Spy Tales, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

Russian President Vladimir Putin was reading Russian language copies of The New York Times and The Washington Post.

“How stupid these people be,” Putin pushed the copies of both papers into the waste paper basket where they were removed by the Russian bear (possessed by the ghost of Rasputin) for him to use as toilet paper.

“I’m almost inspired to manipulate the results of the 2020 U.S. Presidential election,” Putin mused aloud, “to make up for the false accusations that I manipulated the results of the 2016 election. Because the New York Times and The Washington Post can’t bring themselves to admit that the past 50 years of the dumbed down liberal progressive education system (that they approved of and applauded) has resulted in a dumbed down electorate who would actually rather vote for someone like Trump rather than the Establishment’s anointed female messiah Hellcat from Hell. So they have to blame us- the Russians- rather than the Frankenstein monster of an electorate that their liberal progressive educational ideas have created.”

“It is rough, Comrade President,” the Russian vampiress Svetlana Kireeva had to admit as she smoothed her Red Army brown skirt.

“What really pisses me off is that if we wanted someone as a Manchurian candidate puppet to be President and our elite team of hackers could put that individual into office, what makes them think we’d choose Trump?” Putin gazed out the Kremlin window, “Total nutcases are so unpredictable and don’t make very good puppets. And these jerks in the liberal U.S. media don’t think Russian Intelligence is good enough to spot a nutcase when we see one? We have a lot more intelligence in spotting one than do the American electorate.”

“America’s biggest mistake in the long run will be to underestimate Russian intelligence,” Svetlana crossed her legs and crushed a miniature American flag under her spiked stiletto.

. . .

“Who does this Donald Trump think he is anyways?” Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro raged to his companion, “Telling me that I’m not the legitimate President of Venezuela.”

“This Trump has a massive ego,” Maduro’s companion played with his moustache and threw the Gillette shaving kit into the garbage as real men don’t use Gillette.

“Anything Donald Trump can do, I can do better,” Maduro pounded his fists on the desk, “He thinks he can shut the U.S. government down for 35 days and not pay his government workers just to get a wall built? Well I can hold food and medical aid up at the Venezuelan border for far longer than that and starve my entire people into submission to me so that everyone in this entire country gives me the love and respect and honour and adoration I so richly deserve.”

“You da man,” the ghost of Soviet dictator Josef Stalin (recently granted dispensational temporary leave from Tartarus by Hades) smiled as he continued to play with his moustache and ate a plate of perogies as he fondly recalled memories of the Soviet government enforced famine on Ukrainians back in 1932-33.

. . .

Miranda Singh the Executive Secretary to the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set received a call from her boss on her mobile.

There would be an unexpected and univited visitor at the Set Enterprises laboratory tonight, Set said.

He told Miranda to give the man what he wanted.

. . .

Italian Intelligence secret agent Luigi Linguini was on a mission for the Italian government.

The current Italian government was in a cold war (which might turn hot at any moment) with French President Emmanuel Macron.

The Italian government wanted to bring Macron down and they had heard that Set Enterprises’ Dr. Cadbury Rocher had conducted an extensive DNA analysis of Macron’s DNA.

The Italian government needed to see that file.

Luigi was about to use his screwdriver to open the door to the room of the Rocher Secret Archives.

When suddenly the door opened on its own and there stood Miranda Singh:

“This way to the Macron File,” she smiled at him.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday February 12th
2019.

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Renfield Does A Web Show and Vladimir Putin Gets Blown By A Cyborg

November 27, 2014 at 8:21 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Renfield Does A Web Show and Vladimir Putin Gets Blown By A Cyborg

Amdeus Emanon was in the living room of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s colossal London mansion.

Renfield R. Renfield was in the mansion’s broadcast and recording studio and satellite and computer monitoring room.

Amadeus was on his iPad.

He was watching a web cast show that Renfield was doing live from the broadcast room.

After Renfield discovered that actor Alec Baldwin was doing his own web cast show from the back of a New York City taxicab giving relationship advice to unsuspecting couples, Renfield decided to do his own web cast show in which he interviewed the spouses of well known celebrities.

Amadeus looked at the time.

It looked like Renfield’s very first web cast show with his very first guest was about to start.

. . .

“So,” Renfield beamed at the camera as his guest appeared on the satellite TV screen in the studio, “we’re proud to have as our first guest… Mrs. Bill Cosby. Nice to have you with us today, Camille.”

“Good to be here, Mr. Renfield,” Mrs. Cosby smiled.

“So,” Renfield asked his first question, “what’s it like being the wife of a serial rapist?”.

The interview came to an abrupt end far far sooner than Renfield had anticipated.

. . .

Russian President Vladimir Putin was in his office in the Kremlin getting a blow job from his bodyguard the red-headed female cyborg Sophia.

Putin had been missing his blow jobs for quite a long time recently.

After all being a despotic ruler was quite a strenuous and stressful job.

He used to get good blow jobs from his former bodyguard the Russian Vampiress Svetlana Kireeva of the FSB.

But back in August of this year, Svetlana Kireeva had been abducted by persons unknown in Munich, Bavaria.

She was now being held in an MI-6 interrogation center in London.

Then a couple of weeks ago, Vladimir Putin received a call on his personal phone from Renfield R. Renfield.

Several years ago, Renfield had been given the Russian built cyborg Sophia as a gift from Vladimir Putin.

Sophia had originally been created back in September 2010 by the former East German Stasi scientist Dr. Nicht Werhoffen who now worked for the Russian FSB.

(For background on the creation of the red headed female cyborg Sophia please read:

http://thevampiresamurai.blogspot.ca/2010/09/doing-molochs-work.html?m=1

http://thevampiresamurai.blogspot.ca/2010/09/sex-and-cyborgs-and-politics.html?m=1

http://thevampiresamurai.blogspot.ca/2010/09/renfield-finds-interesting-photo.html?m=1

http://thevampiresamurai.blogspot.ca/2010/09/tea-with-renfield-and-dr-nicht.html?m=1

http://thevampiresamurai.blogspot.ca/2010/09/amadeus-meets-sophia.html?m=1

)

In the phone conversation a couple of weeks ago, Renfield said he’d sell back the cyborg Sophia to Putin for the sum of $7 billion U. S.

Putin sighed.

Dr. Nicht Werhoffen was never able to create another cyborg as sexually pleasurable as the red-headed female cyborg Sophia.

And Putin also missed Svetlana Kireeva’s breathtakingly ecstatic Midnight Serenades played so lovingly on his instrument by her delicately sensual and exquisitely luscious red lips.

Putin was also tiring of using a saxophone as a substitute sex doll on his own personal instrument (which he had been doing since August).

So Putin seized the property of some poor snook Russian oligarch whom he suddenly accused of treason and then using the back-door money laundering operations of several major Western banks (to avoid the sanctions the West had imposed on Russia over the war in Ukraine), he
paid the $7 billion to Renfield.

In doing so, Putin was totally oblivious to the fact that it had been Renfield R. Renfield who had abducted Russian Vampiress Svetlana Kireeva from an antique store in Munich, Bavaria in the first place.

And that it had also been Renfield who was the anonymous seller on eBay who had sold Putin some antique Bavarian beer mugs (that the Russian leader had been looking for) back in August.

Renfield had stolen the antique beer mugs from Russian Vampiress Svetlana Kireeva in the first place (she had purchased them for her boss Putin) when he had abducted her from the antique store in Munich Bavaria.

Read all about it here:

http://thevampiresamurai.blogspot.ca/2014/08/renfield-puts-ad-on-ebay.html?m=1

It was quite a relief to Putin when Sophia arrived in Moscow.

(Renfield had sent Putin the cyborg within 24 hours of receiving the $7 billion U.S. in his personal numbered Swiss bank account).

Putin had positively gorged himself on receiving Sophia’s blow jobs.

Plus Sophia had also saved Putin’s life from a CIA trained koala bear assassin who had tried to assassinate him at the G-20 Summit in Brisbane Australia on the evening of November 15th to 16th of this year (a preliminary investigation of the incident by the Russian FSB had determined that the assassin was a koala bear personally trained by American CIA agent Bob Belfor).

For more on the cyborg Sophia’s saving of Vladimir Putin’s life, read here:

https://draculvanhelsing.wordpress.com/2014/11/15/of-androids-and-koalas/

Putin decided to add to his pleasure by putting on a video as Sophia blew him.

The video he put on was an exclusive FSB filmed video (for Putin’s eyes only) of professional Russian Army soldiers serving as “volunteers” in eastern Ukraine using a BUK surface-to-air missile to shoot down Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17 back on July 17th 2014.

As the video showed debris falling from the sky and bodies dropping to the ground, Putin came with the full force of Mount Vesuvius erupting in 79 AD.

“Oh, what sweet and joyful ecstasy!” Putin screamed.

Sophia started choking.

That was quite a mouthful for her to swallow.

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
during the period
Friday November 21st
to
Wednesday November 26th
2014.

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