Lilith In The Graveyard Garden of Good and Evil

January 3, 2021 at 11:59 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Literature, Mystery, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, Romance, Sorcery, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )


The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith in the graveyard garden of good and evil

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was doing another one of his Sunday night podcasts:

“Just an important historical note of interest, which if shown to be correct, will be noted by future historians.
Here’s the gist:
A final political showdown is coming January 6th as the U.S. Congress meets to elect CCP stooge Joe Biden as President.
The 1st American Civil War began on April 12th 1861 just 13 days after the previous Easter Sunday (March 31st 1861).
Will the 2nd American Civil War begin on January 7th 2021 just 13 days after the previous Christmas Day?
History has a strange way of balancing itself out in such occurrences.”
-Renfield R. Renfield British MP

. . .

The body of Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun was rushed from Dublin Ireland to London England by the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set’s eco-friendly environmentally friendly cannabis powered dirigible airship the High Calypso.

It was assumed that the cause of Yaldabaoth’s death was the Lakota Sioux Princess Tanaka wearing a killer outfit.

However after an operation carried out by a surgical suit wearing Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster wearing a surgical mask and using his surgical gloved lobster claws to perform an incision, it was determined that the cause of death was Yaldabaoth’s eating poisoned lutefisk.

After a quick check of the Irish High King Brian Boru’s Medieval Treatise On Leprechaun Ailments (a copy of which was found in the billionaire vampire Set’s library and rare book collection), apparently eating poisoned lutefisk was one of the few things that could kill a usually immortal leprechaun.

After visualizing London dominatrix Sherrielock Holmes wearing a killer outfit (which caused his lobster tank to explode), Michelangelo went into a trance and saw the circumstances which led to Yaldabaoth’s death.

Apparently after visiting the CERN Large Hadron Collidor tunnel in Switzerland, Yaldabaoth had gone to Rome to see the Vatican’s ugly looking Nativity display (which was put up to welcome the arrival of an alien ET saviour who graduated with a degree in New York School of Art Abstract Surrealist and Neo-Modernist Studies).

After barfing all over the Vatican Nativity display, Yaldabaoth then wandered the halls of the Vatican.

At first he thought he had entered a gay bath house but after viewing classical and Renaissance works of art in the halls and on the walls, the wee leprechaun deduced that he was indeed inside the Vatican.

Yaldabaoth went into a room where some Vatican Cardinals had prepared a New Year’s Day feast for their fellow cardinal Robert Cardinal Sarah of Guinea the prefect of the Vatican Congregation For Divine Worship and The Discipline of the Sacraments.

The feast, which consisted of large portions of poisoned Norwegian lutefisk, had been made by a group of atheistic Marxist Cardinals hoping to bump off Cardinal Robert Sarah who was a devout Catholic Christian.

Yaldabaoth, who was starting to feel hungry after having previously barfed all over the Vatican’s Nativity display, then proceeded to eat up all the poisoned lutefisk.

And in so doing saved Robert Cardinal Sarah’s life.

. . .


The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith next to Edgar Allan Poe’s grave in the cemetery of the Westminster Presbyterian Church in Baltimore Maryland

The ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith was kneeling in the cemetery of the Westminster Presbyterian Church in Baltimore, Maryland.

She was kneeling in front of Edgar Allan Poe’s grave.

A group of mischievous Irish leprecauns living in Baltimore had put up Irish Celtic crosses atop Poe’s grave and graves next to it that would have caused the Ulster Irish Presbyterian pastor Rev. Ian Paisley of Belfast Northern Ireland to pull his hair out if he had still been alive and seen it.

It was a moonlit night in Baltimore, as billionaire Elon Musk who had just built himself an artificial moon and was giving a full moon trial test run over Baltimore on this lovely windswept evening, and so the moonlight shone down on top of Lilith in front of Poe’s burial place.

The artificial full moonlight of Elon Musk’s artificial moon was causing mysterious looking red roses to grow all over the cemetery.

A raven flew down atop Poe’s gravemarker and croaked “Nevermore”.

Indeed it would be the last time the Raven would croak Nevermore for he croaked shortly thereafter.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday December 3rd
2021.

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Dracul Van Helsing Meets The Norse Goddess Freya

September 25, 2017 at 3:27 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

The results of the German national election were in.

German Chancellor Angela Merkel had won a 4th term in office.

But the far-right ultra-nationalist AfD (Alternative fur Deutschland) came in 3rd place in the number of seats they won in the German Bundestag.

The Norse goddess Freya knew this would amount to trouble.

Already the Germanic god Wotan (whose Norse name was Odin) was making plans with the grey wolf formerly known as Adolf to take advantage of AfD’s surprising showing.

Ever since the bloodshed unleashed by German leaders Kaiser Wilhelm II and Fuhrer Adolf Hitler during the 20th Century, Freya thought of herself as more a Norse goddess rather than a Germanic goddess.

Today she would be meeting with vampire hunter and MI-6 agent Dracul Van Helsing to discuss the German election result and AfD’s showing.

Given his background in investigating matters supernatural and paranormal, Dracul would take note of Freya’s knowledge of the dark supernatural forces involved in AfD’s upsurge in popularity among the German electorate.

Plus Dracul Van Helsing was friends with British Transhumanist MP Renfield R. Renfield believed to be Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II’s most favoured choice to become Prime Minister should a National Unity coalition government be formed in the Westminster Parliament.

Freya sat there waiting for him.

Dracul Van Helsing approached.

“Are you ready to get started?” Freya asked.

“Yes,” Dracul answered, “but only if you take me over your knee and spank me first.”

“All right,” Freya adjusted her gray mini dress for she had been expecting this request, “lay across my skirt and I’ll spank you.”

She had heard that Dracul had made this request of other goddesses and vampiresses before entering into delicate negotiations.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday September 25th
2017.

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Dracul Van Helsing and Sherrielock Holmes: The Nymph of The Blue Moon: A Poem

January 9, 2017 at 1:32 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Poetry, Romance, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Dracul Van Helsing Canadian vampire hunter walked the streets of London
Dressed in his Philip Marlowe Private Eye style trenchcoat and fedora hat
that he always wore when he was feeling melancholy and reflective
A fan of 1940s horror, mystery, detective and film noir films
Dressing like Marlowe helped him battle his depression
The knight of Raymond Chandler’s stories
who wore not a suit of shining armour
but a private eye trenchcoat and fedora hat
when rescuing damsels in distress and battling evil and corruption
A 1940s southern California equivalent of the Spanish Don Quixote
representing knightly chivalry and ideas in ages that had long forgotten them

Now it was early January 2017
Donald Trump was about to be inaugurated President
Hillary Clinton was blaming the Russians for her electoral defeat
and satyr serial killing contract assassin Pan Goatee
was putting in excessively long hours of overtime
in his chosen vocation of making the world a more beautiful place to live
The only females who seemed to radiate any class or good taste these days
(and nights) were vampiresses
which made Dracul Van Helsing Vampire Hunter
glad that he didn’t slay vampiresses

Dracul recalled his New Year’s Eve this past stroke of midnight and year change
when he watched beautiful Assyrian women dancing
and so wished he could join them

The day after New Year’s he visited Dulcinea Lucia a gypsy fortune teller in London
to hear his future
“You shall meet an immortal,” Dulcinea Lucia told Dracul, “and you shall fall in love.”

“An immortal?” Dracul asked her, “A vampiress?”
“Not a vampiress,” Dulcinea shook her head.
“One of the goddesses of the ancient world returned to Earth perhaps?’ Dracul asked again.
“Not one of those goddesses,” Dulcinea shook her head.
“Then what sort of immortal?” Dracul asked a third question.
“I’m not sure,” Dulcinea looked puzzled and her crystal ball clouded up with the Cosmic Operator asking for more money.

Dracul declined to pay more and walked out into the wintery London night
He passed the window of a used book store
which had The Complete Stories of Sherlock Holmes in the window
Dracul loved Sherlock Holmes stories
The great immortal detective
Too bad that immortal didn’t have a sister who was both beautiful and brainy

Then this past evening of January 6th, Dracul had been invited to a masquerade ball
celebrating the 12th Day of Christmas
He decided to dress up as the Phantom of the Opera Erik
since these days and nights he felt as unloved as that poor creature

As he walked down the street in the falling snow, he happened to pass
Alexis Tsipras the Prime Minister of Greece
who was busy rubbing his rear end and screaming,
“My buns! Poor tomatoed buns! Will they ever lose their red rosy colour
in the light of day or the darkness of night?”

“Well, he’s been drinking too much Ouzo this evening,” Dracul thought to himself
Dracul then entered the place where the masquerade ball was being held
He wandered aimlessly through the house
until he entered a room where he saw the nymph of the Blue Moon

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday January 8th
2016

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