Morgana On An Early March Evening
The Welsh Vampiress Morgana in a forest on an early March evening
Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing was wandering through an English forest on an early March evening.
He had a crossbow in hand and a bunch of silver arrows in a pouch on his back.
There were reports of a demonically possessed elk in the forest.
The elk had apparently been given to Justin Welby the ArchHeretic of Sodom and Gomorrah (although his official title was Archbishop of Canterbury) by Joe Biden’s cabinet for his efforts in getting Baphomet approved Alphabet Soup Community sexual practices accepted by the Church of England and the global Anglican Community.
The elk was an animal now extinct in Britain.
So Biden’s cabinet thought that putting an a-sexual non-binary gender confused elk from the U.S. Democratic Party stronghold state of Colorado into the British Isles as a gift to ArchHeretic Welby would somehow magically replenish the elk population.
When ArchHeretic Welby was presented the gift by gender confused Rachel Somebody Or Other (an Assistant Secretary of Something or Other in Biden’s cabinet), the elk had a cassette tape recorder around his/her/its neck which when you pushed a button on it, a voice came on that said, “I’m Joe Biden and I approve this present 🎁.”
The elk had apparently become demonically possessed after using a Ouija board to swear its allegiance to the demon Baphomet.
It had escaped from Welby’s country ecclesial episcopal palace and was now terrorizing native British deer 🦌 in a nearby forest.
After consulting a rare volume on Demonic Possession of Animals written by the Rev. Father Montague Summers, the Rev. Father Aidan Bury Saint Edmunds (who was Amadeus Emanon’s parish priest and Vicar) had told Dracul Van Helsing that the only way to rid the world of a demonically possessed elk was to kill it with a silver arrow.
So Van Helsing was now going through the forest with his crossbow and silver arrows when he came upon this sight:
Van Helsing put down his crossbow and silver arrows and proceeded to climb the fallen tree and make out with the Welsh Vampiress Morgana (who was a member of the British Parliament from the constituency of Newbridge In Wales 🏴 and a British Arthurian Party parliamentary colleague of British MP Renfield R. Renfield who represented Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds).
As Van Helsing and Morgana made wild passionate love on the fallen tree, the demonically possessed elk walked by.
The elk used its antlers (thus indicating that the elk was a biologically born male who only became gender confused after attending U.S. Democratic Party sessions on the party’s future wildlife strategy) to attack a possible candidate for the future leadership of the Scottish Nationalist Party.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday March 3rd
2023.
Renfield R. Renfield and The British Arthurian ₱arty
Welsh vam₱iress Morgana Fay Lee holds a red fox at British M₱ Renfield R. Renfield’s Christmas Day ₱ress conference in which he announces the change of name from the British Transhumanist ₱arty to the British Arthurian ₱arty
Morgana and The Horns of Cernunnos
Morgana and The Horns of Cernunnos
The Welsh vampiress Morgana was very good friends with Cernunnos the horned stag god of the Celts.
For sport, Cernunnos used to take his bow and arrow and hunt those humans who hunted deer for sport.
In the 13th Century in England, the most notorious stag and deer hunter of them all was Lord James Hamish Belfor of the appropriately named Hellreach Castle.
Cernunnos vowed to put an end to this Lord James Hamish Belfor of Hellreach once and for all.
As Lord Belfor was sitting with his fellow hunters celebrating the day’s hunt in The Cyclops Arms Pub, a monk who was a mystic spoke to him, “Did you know that Cernunnos is now hunting for you, oh Lord Belfor of Hellreach?”.
“Who’s Cernunnos?” Asked one of Lord Belfor’s friends who wasn’t very bright (a number of Canadian Prime Ministers in the far distant future would be descended from this questioner’s loins).
“He’s the horned stag god of the Celts, you ninny,” Lord Belfor of Hellreach laughed as he downed yet another pint of cider.
The monk departed the inn just as the Welsh vampiress Morgana entered.
“You know what I’m going to do?” Lord Belfor boasted to his friends, “I’m going to hunt this Cernunnos myself and I swear to the infernal gods below that I shall have this deity’s stag horns hanging on my own castle wall.”
“You fool,” Morgana laughed at him, “You cannot get the horns belonging to a god. Only someone who gives their soul to a devil can do that.”
The lovely vampiress turned and walked out the pub door.
“Then that is what I shall do,” Lord Belfor of Hellreach laughed.
The following night, Lord Belfor summoned Mephistopheles and sold his soul to him in exchange for coming into possession of the horns of Cernunnos.
And so the horns of Cernunnos ended up on the wall of Lord James Hamish Belfor of Hellreach.
The day after that, Lord Belfor was gored to death by a stag.
And so Mephistopheles did not have to wait long to collect his debt.
Of course Cernunnos being a god, his horns grew back.
But someday he vowed to get back his old horns currently on the wall of the Belfor family’s Hellreach Castle.
. . .
During the 1890s, Lord James Hamish Belfor the 13th was in a position to become Prime Minister of Britain.
In fact, he was the favourite of Germany’s Kaiser Wilhelm II to become Prime Minister of Britain as the notorious and traitorous lord would be the Kaiser’s puppet.
One fateful day, Lord Belfor 13th of Hellreach would slay 13 stags in a forest not far from Hellreach Castle.
He went home to celebrate.
He also expected to be summoned shortly by Queen Victoria to form a government.
That night, he paid a visit to the nearby Cyclops Arms Pub to boast of his success with the members of the Saint Hubertus Hunting Lodge.
When he returned home, he discovered one light was already on in the castle’s grand hall as he walked through the door:
Lights shone on the horns of Cernunnos as the Welsh vampiress Morgana stood underneath.
“What the Hell are you doing here?” Lord Belfor angrily asked Morgana.
Standing on the central staircase of the grand hall was the Celtic stag god Cernunnos who raised his crossbow and fired a poisoned arrow at Lord James Hamish Belfor the 13th.
The dreadful Lord died instantly.
Instead of being summoned by Her Majesty Queen Victoria to form a government, Lord Belfor’s body was measured for a casket in an undertaker’s shop and his soul was carried off to Tartarus by Mephistopheles.
And Cernunnos joined his old horns together with his new ones.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday December 29th
2019.
Legacy of The Baskervilles
Legacy of The Baskervilles
“I always wanted to do a movie based on a Sherlock Holmes story,” said the ghost of Orson Welles as he entered Baskerville Hall.
“And you’re thinking of the Hound of The Baskervilles?” Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing asked.
“I am,” Welles lit himself a spectral cigar.
“Of course that story has been done several times in film format,” Van Helsing noted, “you will have to do something that makes yours stand out from the rest.”
“Precisement,” Welles pulled out a bottle of spectral red wine from one overcoat pocket and a glass from the other, “and I’m just the man to do it.”
“I would have to agree,” Van Helsing nodded.
“So I hear Baskerville Hall is now owned by Britain’s Heritage Trust,” Welles poured himself a glass of spectral red wine.
“It is,” Van Helsing acknowledged, “it was purchased recently by Dashwood Forrest the owner of The Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in London. He donated it to Heritage Trust to get a big charity donation receipt to help him with a big tax deduction.”
“A most astute decision,” Welles sipped his red wine.
“So, have you given much thought to how you intend to make your adaptation of The Hound of The Baskervilles different?” Van Helsing asked.
“Let us go into the living room of Baskerville Hall,” Welles suggested, “perhaps seeing that large spacious room will give me some ideas.”
Welles and Van Helsing entered the living room.
And there stood….
The Welsh vampiress Morgana.
“As you know,” Morgana spoke, “Britain’s new Prime Minister Boris Johnson recently appointed me Deputy Home Secretary In Charge of Midnight Security. And both of you are trespassing on Heritage Trust property.”
Welles’ ghost made haste out of the living room and out of Baskerville Hall on the off chance that Morgana might sic the ghost of the Hound of the Baskervilles on him.
Only Dracul Van Helsing remained.
The Welsh vampiress took the vampire hunter over her knee and spanked him.
Welles’ ghost walked around the Baskerville Hall grounds and finished his spectral bottle of spectral red wine and smoked his entire spectral box of spectral cigars.
He thought he better go back inside and see what happened to Van Helsing.
There was Van Helsing on the living room floor having tantric sex with Morgana.
Welles turned and hastily closed the door behind him (forgetting that he could walk through doors and walls).
“Well,” Welles took out a piece of spectral chewing gum, “after seeing that scene, that should give me no shortage of ideas on how to make my film adaptation of The Hound of the Baskervilles different from everybody else’s.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday August 7th
2019.
Welsh Vampiress Morgana and The Killer Locust
Welsh Vampiress Morgana and The Killer Locust
The Welsh vampiress Morgana was being followed by a spy for the Rome-based Egyptian vampire Osiris.
She was walking through Collingwood Hills Park not far from the estate of the London based billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set.
The spy (which was a giant locust) had been created by the Jesuit priest and scientist Father Caiaphas Bar Yochai who did contract research work and experimentation for Osiris.
Father Caiaphas would have been best known (if people knew he did it) for having stolen a flying basilisk (a creature part rooster and part serpent who usually did not have the ability to fly) that had been genetically created by Set Enterprises’ chief scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher, and the Jesuit had used the flying basilisk with its venomous fiery breath to set fire to Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris this past April 15th.
Osiris knew that the Welsh vampiress Morgana was the parliamentary colleague and fellow British Transhumanist MP of Renfield R. Renfield a former Set Enterprises employee who still worked closely with his former boss the Vampire Set (who was Osiris’ arch enemy).
The Egyptian deity (who resided in Rome not far from the Vatican) thought that spying on Renfield’s parliamentary colleague might prove informative and advantageous.
Father Caiaphas’ spy locust made a lot of noise as it followed
Morgana through the forest.
Morgana quickly turned around.
Fortunately for Morgana, she had received a text message that morning from Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster (who had typed it on his waterproof iPhone with his lobster claws in his aquarium at the Set Enterprises laboratory).
Michelangelo advised her to put some extra strength Raid House and Garden Bug Killer on her spiked stilettos as this might come in handy at some point in the day.
Morgana had followed Michelangelo’s advice and put some on the points of her spiked stilettos.
As soon as Morgana saw the locust spy, she kicked it with one of her insecticidal laced spiked stilettos on one of her high heeled shoes.
The huge locust immediately fell over dead.
“How did you do that?” Asked an astonished bystander.
“It’s like that old TV commercial used to say,” Morgana smiled at him, “It’s Raid. Guaranteed to kill bugs dead.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday July 17th
2019.
Author’s note: The above is apparently my 2000th blog post that I’ve posted on WordPress.
Wow, 2000 blog posts already.
Renfield Meets Captain Kerry Donegal In The Oscar Wilde Pub
British MP Renfield R. Renfield was sitting in a newly opened London pub called The Oscar Wilde.
He was planning his strategy to have his friend the Kraken Napoleon VI elected the new President of the European Union Commission.
Seeing as how German Chancellor Angela Merkel and French President Emmanuel Macron were in disagreement as to who should be the new EU Commission President, this allowed an opportunity for a rogue Brit like himself to put a Kraken into that position.
Seeing as how this was The Oscar Wilde Pub, Renfield decided to order himself a glass of absinthe as this was the favourite drink of such notorious writers and poets as Oscar Wilde and Charles Baudelaire and artist/painters such as Henri Toulouse-Lautrec and Amedeo Modigliano.
Seeing as how Renfield was neither an American Jesuit priest nor a leading U.S. Democratic Party politician nor a Hollywood bigwig, he ignored the fact that absinthe was also drunk by such satanic low-lifes as Aleister Crowley.
After 21 glasses of absinthe, Renfield was able to see spirits so as soon as the ghost of the 18th Century Irish pirate of the Caribbean Captain Kerry Donegal walked through the door, the MP invited him to sit down.
They introduced themselves to another and gave their respective backgrounds.
“So,” Renfield ordered another glass of absinthe, “you’re the pirate’s ghost that my psychic lobster friend Michelangelo saw ride that supposedly riderless horse Bodexpress at the Preakness Stakes?”.
“That was me all right,” the ghostly pirate blushed adding a little rouge to his overly white complexion, “I came in second from last.”
“We all have our embarassing moments,” Renfield recalled the lovely actress Gong Li turning him down for a date after he had asked her out in a crowded elevator.
“So how’s your political career going?” Captain Kerry Donegal asked.
“Well if Boris Johnson wins the leadership of the British Conservative Party in July and becomes Prime Minister of Britain,” Renfield ordered a tuna fish sandwich, “I’ll probably become Deputy Foreign Secretary In Charge of Geopolitical Intelligence Gathering and my parliamentary colleague and fellow Transhumanist MP the Welsh vampiress Morgana will probably become Deputy Home Secretary In Charge of Midnight Security.”
“Well, congratulations,” the pirate captain drank a toast in ghostly extra spirited absinthe.
“Still, I mustn’t count my chickens before they’re hatched,” Renfield helped himself to a plate of deviled eggs, “so what are your plans for the future?”.
“I haven’t quite decided,” Captain Kerry Donegal answered, “I moved out of 10 Downing Street last night after Prime Minister Theresa May invited me to watch the 1947 film The Ghost and Mrs. Muir starring Gene Tierney and Rex Harrison with her. After watching the film, I came to the conclusion that Mrs. May wanted to have a romantic affair with me so I left.”
“Yes, singing My Fair Lady to Gene Tierney isn’t so bad,” Renfield admitted, “singing it to Theresa May is another matter entirely.”
“By Liza, rather than sitting in the saddle to do little, I should have said to Bodexpress, move your bloomin’ ass,” the pirate captain reflected.
“And speaking of my fair lady, here comes my parliamentary colleague Morgana,” Renfield, after 23 glasses of absinthe, ran up to kiss her as she entered the pub.
“Why you predatory sexually harassing lecherous pervert,” Morgana said to him before kicking him out the door with one of her spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes.
“Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder,” were Renfield’s last words before succumbing to unconsciousness on the outdoor sidewalk.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday May 28th
2019.
Welsh vampiress Morgana: Not one to mess with
Rahaf al-Qunun Granted Asylum In Canada
British MP Renfield R. Renfield drank a toast in champagne with his fellow British Transhumanist Party caucus MP the Welsh vampiress Morgana over the fact that Saudi woman Rahaf al-Qunun was being able to toast her new found freedom in red wine aboard a flight from Bangkok Thailand (via Seoul South Korea) to Toronto.
Toasting her new found freedom in red wine would no doubt cause many extremist Wahhabi imams in Saudi Arabia to roll over in their soaked liquid filled mattresses (caused by nocturnal and daytime emissions brought about by visualized thoughts of the 72 dark eyed houri promised them).
Earlier this evening, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau announced that the Canadian federal government would be granting refugee status to Miss Rahaf al-Qunun in Canada.
After having made the announcement, Justin spent a few minutes wondering about what had become of his beloved cannabis marijuana pot smoking desert cactus plant Strawberry Fields Forever.
The pot smoking and prickly little fellow had been kidnapped last month by Chinese Communist vampiress Mei-ling Manchu (the daughter of well known 1920s and ’30s mad scientist Dr. Fu Manchu of Sax Rohmer narrative fame) in retaliation for last month’s arrest of Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou by Canadian authorities on the orders of the “jealous because we’re lagging behind China in developing 5G networks” U.S. government.
Justin Trudeau missed conversing with the rather silent little fellow but more importantly missed the cannabis smoke exhaled by the greenhouse creature with the prickly disposition.
Inhaling all that smoke would allow him to converse with the ET gray Gali-Gula from planet Nibiru (who was possessed by the spirit of the ancient earthling Roman Emperor Caligula).
For some reason, the Canadian Prime Minister was only able to see the odd looking and eccentric gray little creature when he had been inhaling pot.
Justin was seeking Gali-Gula’s advice on who he should get to replace Scott Brison as President of the Canadian Treasury Board next Monday.
As Renfield sipped the champagne (and wondered whether 2004 was a good year as far as the French champagne growers were concerned), he thought of his good friend the Vietnamese vampiress Ho Babylon Minh who was the pearl white sparkling incisors smiling vampirically immortal granddaughter of the late Vietnamese President Ho Chi Minh.
Renfield and Ho had recently worked together in poisoning Apple CEO Tim Cook (again in retaliation for the arrest of Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou at Vancouver International Airport).
Ho Babylon Minh was the one responsible for tonight’s happy conclusion in the Rahaf al-Qunun case.
When Rahaf al-Qunun had been detained by Thai authorities at Bangkok International Airport back on January 6th and a Saudi diplomat had confiscated her passport (no doubt with the same wanna be enthusiastic charm shown towards Saudi journalist Jamal Khashoggi at the Saudi consulate in Istanbul back in October), Ho Babylon Minh had rushed to Thailand to converse with her friend the King of Thailand.
As a result of Ho’s intervention, Miss Rahaf’s deportation back to Saudi Arabia was delayed.
If Miss Rahaf had been sent back to Saudi Arabia, it would most likely have been a race between her family and Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman’s rather extensively large diplomatic janitorial cleaning service to see who could kill her first.
The United Nations Commission on Human Rights intervened and granted Rahaf al-Qunun refugee status.
Causing Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman to burst a blood vessel in his middle finger as he was examining plans for a Mark of the Beast system to be implemented for future citizens of his proposed autonomous NEOM economic zone along the Red Sea.
And now Rahaf al-Qunun was headed towards a new life in Toronto Canada.
. . .
U.S. President Donald Trump was lying in bed when suddenly the ghost of Sir Laurence Olivier appeared in front of him.
Olivier was portraying the role of Tom Snout a character in William Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream.
Tom Snout was a tinker and one of the “mechanicals” of Athens an amateur theatre troupe putting on Pyramus and Thisbe a play within a play within A Midsummer Night’s Dream.
Snout played the part of the wall separating Pyramus and Thisbe in Pyramus and Thisbe.
Olivier as Tom Snout as the Wall spoke thus,
In this same interlude it doth befall
That I, one Snout by name, present a wall…
With that a 219 inch colour TV built by Samsung appeared in mid-air.
“It may cost anywhere between $10,000 and $100,000
but far cheaper than $5.7 billion which only a knave and an ass would spend…”
Trump started screaming as his toupee suddenly became infested with the same black coloured crickets and cockroaches that had suddenly and mysteriously infested Mecca within the past few days.
Lexington his butler and valet entered the Presidential bedroom as Trump’s secret service bodyguards were fast asleep as they were no longer being paid due to the government shutdown.
“Is there something the matter, sir?” Lexington called out in the darkness.
“I’m having to shampoo my hair with a blow torch,” Trump cried back.
“Very good, sir,” Lexington closed the door and went back to bed.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday January 11th
2019.
Rahaf al-Qunun: Off to a new life in Canada.
How Renfield Spent Saint Nicholas’ Day
British MP Renfield R. Renfield had spent the morning at the Aulos Music and Recording Ltd.’s Wuthering Heights and Glencoe Hospitality Studios owned by music promoter Heathcliff Dionysus Campbell.
After the old time Christmas musical hit song Baby, It’s Cold Outside was deemed too politically incorrect for pot smoking self-proclaimed feminist Justin Trudeau’s Canada and was being pulled from being played on most Canadian radio stations over the Christmas season, Renfield recorded his own version of the song in a duet with the famous New Orleans vampiress and songstress Angelique Dumont.
He then used his hacking skills to hack into most Canadian radio stations’ play lists and inserted a code by which the song would be played every 20 minutes on radio.
He then hired a bunch of newly arrived immigrants in Canada who had trouble getting jobs to work and drive around in ice cream trucks where the song Baby, It’s Cold Outside would be played on the loudspeakers to let frozen Canadian neighbourhoods know that the ice cream truck was coming.
Afterwards he went down to the Westminster House of Commons to deliver a statement in Parliament on his British Transhumanist Party’s official position on the global trade, foreign and defense policies of the Trump Administration in Washington DC.
The Speaker of the House called on Renfield to make the statement, “I understand the Honourable Member for Tewkesbury In The Cotswolds wishes to make his party’s official statement on the Trump Administration’s global trade, foreign and defense policies.”
“I do, Mr. Speaker,” Renfield rose to his feet, “Donald Trump is so full of crap that if you gave him an enema before he died, you could bury him in a cigar box.”
He then sat down again.
Renfield believed in making his speeches brief and to the point.
Later when he returned home, he phoned the Dragon Warrioress Crown Princess Lenora of Lemuria.
Lenora was holding a group of Russian Navy sailors prisoner in the medieval dungeons of an old castle in Scotland.
They were being guarded by the ghost of the Black Douglas as well as a brigade of British Army Gurkhas.
The ghosts of Humphrey Bogart and Peter Lorre perform an Abbott and Costello comedy routine for the enjoyment of Russian Navy prisoners of Renfield.
The Egyptian cat goddess Bastet then sat on Renfield’s shoulder where the two discussed the Egyptian god/vampire Osiris’ stupidity in getting Hades the god of the Underworld to release the body and soul of French President Emmanuel Macron whom Krampus had dragged down to Tartarus last night.
After mutually agreeing on what an ass Osiris was, Renfield returned to his parliamentary office in Westminster.
There he received a phone call from Chinese President Xi Jinping on whether Renfield and his Brigade of Gurkhas would storm a Canadian prison to release Huawei’s chief financial officer Meng Wangzhou who had just been arrested at Vancouver’s airport and was awaiting extradition to the U.S. for violating Trump Administration sanctions against Iran.
As Xi and Renfield discussed the raid and rescue, his Transhumanist Party colleague and fellow MP the Welsh vampiress Morgana put a book away in the office bookshelf prior to going on a date with Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing:
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday December 6th
2018.
The Welsh Vampiress Morgana Encounters Dracul In A London Cemetery
The Welsh Vampiress Morgana Encounters Dracul In A London Cemetery
The Welsh Vampiress Morgana was waiting for Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing in a London cemetery.
The British Transhumanist MP for the constituency of Newbridge in Wales 🏴 was trying to track down the location of the Ring of Solomon in Israel on behalf of the British government and Set Enterprises.
The Ring of Solomon was the ring that Israel’s King Solomon used to control both demons and djinn 🧞♀️ 🧞♂️ to help him build a Temple to God in Jerusalem.
It had been found in Jerusalem back on December 11th 1917 when British General Edmund Allenby captured the city from the Ottoman Turks.
Allenby had ordered the ring hidden.
He had the location of the ring hidden in code in an oil painting that Allenby had commissioned be painted of his good friend the late Sir Simon Baskerville after the British spymaster’s assassination by Intelligence agents of the German Kaiser.
The oil painting had stood in plain view in the abandoned halls of Baskerville Hall until this past Saturday.
Baskerville Hall was currently owned by London art gallery dealer Dashwood Forrest.
Morgana had got her good friend the maker of Britain’s best frozen steak and kidney pie dinners millionaire Sir Rodney Fahrenham to purchase the painting from Forrest.
Forrest had gone to the Baskerville Hall estate in Devon yesterday to pick up the painting of Sir Simon Baskerville.
And there in the empty frame where the portrait had been- stood- Allatallahbel the Vampiress Priestess of Baal- the vampiress who along with the Vampiric Knights-Templar had been secretly controlling the Vatican since October 13th of last year.
Allatallahbel had flashed a wicked vampiress smile – bearing her vampiric incisors at the Oscar Wilde admiring flamboyant London art gallery dealer.
An astral projected image of a talking otter (who was vigorously holding a bottle of bourbon in one of his flippers) that was being astral projected by DARPA headquarters in the U.S. urged Dashwood to “Run, Forrest, run.”
The talking otter need say no more (and indeed he didn’t- for he immediately started drinking from the bottle of bourbon).
Forrest ran as fast as his legs could carry him.
While the halls of Baskerville Hall rang out with the sinister vampiress laughter of Allatallahbel.
Beneath the great majestic staircase of Baskerville Hall, The Vampiric Knights-Templar stood like choir boys and sang,
“Deck the halls with laughs of vampiress- fang-la-la-la-la…”
Morgana had contacted Dracul Van Helsing for advice on how to get the portrait painting of Sir Simon Baskerville back from Allatallahbel and the Vampiric Knights-Templar.
Dracul Van Helsing approached the Welsh Vampiress Morgana.
He was stark naked.
For he had been drinking bottles of Coca-Cola all afternoon and was quite over caffeinated.
As such, he had forgot to put any clothes on.
Furious, Morgana ordered Dracul to lie across her skirted and silk pantyhose lap as she sat on a gravestone and then pulled out a large wooden hairbrush that she used to give the vampire hunter a spanking he’d never forget.
When she had finished, Dracul mounted Morgana and made wild passionate love to her.
The Hindu god Shiva had been walking by the cemetery with his wife Kali at the time.
Both deities were in London attending the grand opening of London’s latest world class curry 🍛 restaurant serving the best Indian food outside India.
As Dracul and Morgana both came, Shiva remarked to Kali, “That’s the greatest explosion 💥 I’ve seen since Dr. J. Robert Oppenheimer detonated the first atomic bomb at the Trinity test in New Mexico on July 16th 1945 and quoted the Bhagavad Gita, “Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.” “
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday July 29th
2018.
Dracul Van Helsing 
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