The Tamurlane File

April 28, 2014 at 6:21 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Espionage, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

The Tamurlane File

The high-ranking Mossad official who was known only as the Controller of the Golem was reading through his files.

Now that Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan had announced that he was increasing the power of the Turkish Secret Service giving it greater powers of surveillance and extending immunity for its agents, the Controller of the Golem decided to read all the information Mossad had about a certain individual within the Turkish Secret Service who was known only by the code name Tamurlane.

The Controller of the Golem had concerns about this Tamurlane.

He was convinced the man was anti-Semitic and anti-Israel.

Coincidentally just as he was reading through the Tamurlane File, he was handed a new document that had been sent to Mossad by an Israeli agent in the field who was reporting from Pergamon Turkey.

The Mossad agent in Pergamon had apparently uncovered the true identity of Tamurlane.

Excitedly the Controller of the Golem grabbed the newly arrived document and read the name.

Tamurlane was one Imam Mehmet Moustapha the imam of a mosque in Istanbul.

As the Controller of the Golem read details about Imam Mehmet Moustapha, he felt literally quite sick to his stomach.

-To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday April 28th
2014.

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Renfield and Amadeus In Rome

March 27, 2014 at 7:16 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, History, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Renfield and Amadeus In Rome

“So what are we doing in Rome?” Amadeus asked Renfield as he bought a plate of spaghetti and meatballs from a Roman street spaghetti vendor.

“Thought I’d do a little catch up on my hobby of blackmail and extortion,” Renfield replied, “I find my other hobby of stamp collecting starts to get boring after a while. Plus licking the back of all those stamps starts to leave a nasty stain on the tongue.”

“Who are you trying to blackmail in Rome?” Amadeus asked as he spilled spaghetti all over his tuxedo.

“I hear there are some U. S. Secret Service agents who remained behind in one of the rooms of the Vatican after today’s meeting between President Obama and Pope Francis,” Renfield smiled and helped himself to a meatball off Amadeus’ bow tie, “so I thought I’d see what they were up to.”

“Didn’t 3 agents get sent home for drunken behavior in Amsterdam a few days ago?” Amadeus asked as he decided to open a pack of chop sticks to eat his spaghetti instead of using his hands.

“They did,” Renfield looked at the video of the non-blackmail paying Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan eating a barbeque pulled pork sandwich he was about to upload to YouTube oblivious to the fact that Turkey had just blocked its citizens’ access to YouTube, “and back in April 2012 twelve U.S. secret service agents were found guilty of gross misconduct for cavorting with prostitutes ahead of a summit in Cartagena Colombia that President Obama was attending.”

“I wonder how you get to be a U.S. Secret Service agent,” Amadeus mused out loud.

“They’re in this room here according to Google Maps and the G.P.S. signal I’m receiving,” Renfield burst through the door and started flashing pics with his iPhone.

“Oh shit,” the Secret Service agent cried out who was undergoing an enema treatment from an Italian courtesan dressed in a Renaissance evening gown.

In this orgy of U.S. Secret Servants and Italian courtesans were to be found the Greek Vampiress Aphrodite dancing in the nude and a bald-headed and extremely obese dwarf (who was none other than the Greek Vampire Dionysus) pouring wine.

“God, I’ve captured in seconds what would have probably taken Michelangelo years to paint,” Renfield cackled above the moans and groans of secret service agent and courtesan alike.

“I suppose you’re referring to Michelangelo the Renaissance sculptor and painter and not the Boss’ genetically created psychic lobster,” Amadeus helped himself to some of Aphrodite’s oysters.

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday March 27th
2014.

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Peter Whitstable On The Temple Mount

March 23, 2014 at 7:21 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Peter Whitstable On The Temple Mount

Peter Whitstable the man they called the Fox Mulder of Interpol stood on the Temple Mount.

He was looking for signs of a panther that had been seen on the Temple Mount.

Peter Whitstable believed the panther was Konalu a creature that was created by being astral projected from the mind of Fenrir the Battle of Ragnarok apocalyptic wolf from Norse mythology.

He decided it would be a good thing to get out of the office at Interpol’s International Headquarters in Lyon, France because it looked like it would only be a matter of time before his co-workers called the men in the white suits bearing straight jackets and emerging from their paddy wagons.

While in Israel, he had asked to see the man at Mossad they called the Controller of the Golem.

His request for an appointment was turned down.

As he stood on the Temple Mount, he recognized the demon Asmodeus standing on the same mount yawning and smoking a large extra-King sized cigarette.

Peter Whitstable sometimes wished that he had taken up drinking or sniffing glue.

Then he’d have an excuse for seeing what he sometimes saw.

This was one of those moments.

. . .

Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan was in his bedroom.

He looked up and noticed a black panther approaching him.

Unsure of what to do, Erdogan held out his hand and started purring, “Nice kitty. Nice kitty.”

He hoped that the panther wasn’t Syrian and wasn’t a pro-Bashar Assad sympathizer seeing as how Turkey had just shot down a Syrian military plane.

He hoped that the panther wasn’t an avid Twitter user either- one who was pissed at not being able to access his Twitter account in Turkey.

. . .

Russian President Vladimir Putin told the Commander of Russian Forces who were amassing on the border with Ukraine to wait for his instructions on whether or not to go ahead and invade all Ukraine.

He would leave the speaker phone on in his office and if he were to start shouting “Yes! Yes! Yes!” that would be his order to cross the border and take all of Ukraine and unite it to the Russian Motherland.

As he stood at the window and gazed out at the Moscow landscape with its domed churches and crosses, he wondered if he could spot the Golden Arches of the nearest McDonald’s as he suddenly felt a craving for a Big Mac (which mercifully had escaped the list of U.S. and EU sanctions against Moscow).

Suddenly the beautiful and lovely seductress the Babylonian Vampiress Lilith flew in through his office window.

She was wearing the latest spring fashion Cartier white evening dress with gold sequins.

She threw Putin back on to the Russian black bear skin rug in his office, ripped off all his clothes and mounted him.

“Yes! Yes! Yes!” Putin was soon screaming in a matter of minutes.

The General put his phone down.

He addressed his aide- a handsome young lieutenant with whom he re-enacted ancient Spartan army nighttime maneuvers.

“Well there we have the order,” the General said, “we take all of Ukraine.”

“That’s good,” his lieutenant answered, “I’ve kind of got a hankering for Kiev style homemade perogies at the moment.”

“But first you must have a Russian sausage,” the General pulled down his pants.

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday March 23rd
2014.

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