Yaldabaoth, Bono and The Pachamama Grasses

November 8, 2019 at 11:38 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

Yaldabaoth, Bono and The Pachamama Grasses 

Back on Monday October 28th 2019 the day after the Vatican’s Amazon Synod ended, Pope Francis had a meeting with U2 singer Bono and economist Jeffrey Sachs.

At the meeting, Pope Francis’ Vatican and the United Nations signed a pact on sustainable development and global governance by the year 2030.

During that meeting, Pope Francis also gave Bono a planter of some grasses and soil that had been used to invoke the ancient Inca Earth Mother goddess Pachamama at a special ceremony in the Vatican Gardens back on October 4th before the Amazon Synod began.

The same planter of grasses and soil had been given to Pope Francis along with the Communion bread and wine as gifts to be presented on the High Altar of Saint Peter’s Basilica for the closing Mass of the Amazon Synod on October 27th.

Now the planter of Pachamama grasses and soil had been given to Bono by Pope Francis.

But none of this was known to or of any concern to Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun who was walking through the Irish countryside on this Friday evening singing,

“You think she was Queen of the land 
and her hair hung over her shoulders
all tied up with a black velvet band…”

As he walked down the road, he ran into a cow he knew called Daisy Daily.

“Moo!” Daisy greeted him.

“Hello, Daisy,” Yaldabaoth doffed his hat, “You’re a long way from Farmer Riley’s farm.”

“Moo!” Daisy answered him.

“You’re looking for something to eat eh?” Yaldabaoth scratched his head and took a nip from a bottle of Irish whiskey, “Well, I think Bono the U2 singer has his estate somewhere near here. Let’s go see if he has anything to eat at his place.”

Leprechaun and cow headed off down the road to the Bono estate.

Yaldabaoth rang the doorbell of the great house which was promptly answered by Higgins who was Bono’s butler and valet.

“Hello, Higgins,” Yaldabaoth likewise doffed his hat to the butler, “My friend Daisy Daily was looking for something to eat and we were wondering if you could give her something.”

“Well…” Higgins said.

“Moo!” Daisy walked into the house and walked over to the sitting room window where the planter of Pachamama grasses and soil was located.

“Moo!” Daisy proclaimed before eating all the grasses.

The cow then got into the punch bowl on the sitting room table and drank all the punch.

“There’s about 40 litres of alcohol in that punch,” Higgins said.

“Well, not anymore,” Yaldabaoth remarked, “It’s in Daisy now.”

A now inebriated Daisy knocked over the planter of Pachamama soil with her tail.

“I apologize, Higgins,” Yaldabaoth opened the closet door and grabbed the vacuum cleaner, “let me vacuum that up for you.”

The leprechaun then vacuumed up all the dirt.

“That was sacred soil I was told,” Higgins’ hair had turned white.

“Now mixed in with sacred potato chip bits and sacred chocolate bar wrappers,” Yaldabaoth emptied the contents of the vacuum cleaner down the estate’s garbage chute.

“I wonder what Bono will say?” Higgins shook his head.

“Probably I still haven’t found what I’m looking for if he decides to go through the garbage,” Yaldabaoth directed Daisy Daily out the front door where leprechaun and cow headed back to Farmer Riley’s farm.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday November 8th
2019.

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Britain’s Supreme Court Rules Suspending Parliament Was Unlawful

September 24, 2019 at 10:55 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Romance, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

Britain’s Supreme Court Rules Suspending Parliament Was Unlawful 

“Back in the 1970s,” British MP
Renfield R. Renfield told the BBC News Interviewer, “Mr. Justice William Morrow the first Chief Justice of Canada’s Northwest Territories said the end of Western Civilization would be brought about not by student protestors or the actions of foreign powers but by imbeciles sitting as judges on the benches of court rooms everywhere.
History has shown Chief Justice Morrow to be a 100% prophet. What alarmed Chief Justice Morrow was what he considered the vast number of imbeciles who were teaching as professors in various law faculties at universities all across Canada back in the 1970s. He said their erroneous ideas which would overthrow 1500 years of legal traditions and precedents in the Western world would be passed on to their students who would become lawyers and eventually become judges. This has now become the norm in Canada. A judge somewhere making a stupid decision is no longer news. It’s a judge who makes a sensible decision that’s now considered news. So of course there aren’t many real news stories emerging from the Canadian judiciary these days. But what was happening in Canada at the time was also happening in the U.S. and the United Kingdom. So the Age of Imbecility now reigns supreme in the judiciary of all 3 of these nations. Any appointment to the U.S. Supreme Court that does not meet with the approval of Wiccan airhead Alyssa Milano and her fellow Wiccan airheads across America is immediately accused of sexual harassment. And as for stupidity in the UK Judicial system, that can be seen by today’s ruling by Britain’s Supreme Court. On the plus side at least judges are showing what they truly are. The fact that Britain’s Supreme Court President Lady Hale chose to read the court’s judgement while wearing a giant diamond spider brooch on her lapel was at least honest. Poison is now falling across the land.”

. . .

After a day speaking and meeting with people at the UN General Assembly, Donald Trump decided to relax by spending time in an NYC karaoke bar.

Standing on stage was some long haired and bearded type who looked like he could easily fit into the band ZZ Top.

The man began singing an old John Denver song, 

“High Calypso the places you’ve been to,
The things that you’ve shown us,
The stories you tell,
High Calypso, I sing to your spirit,
The men who have served you so long and so well…”

Donald Trump asked his secret service detail, “Who is this guy? He smells of marijuana smoke.”

“I believe he’s a sheriff from some place up in Canada called Calypso’s Bosom,” one of Trump’s secret service bodyguards answered.

“And is this the Calypso he’s singing about?” Trump’s tongue started hanging out and drooling, “Some woman’s bosom? I’d like to go to the places she’s been to as well. And also see the things that she’s shown the men who have served her so long and so well.”

“I believe the Calypso was the research ship for French undersea explorer Jacques Cousteau,” replied another member of Trump’s secret service detail who looked a lot like Detective Dietrich from the TV show Barney Miller.

“Oh,” Trump looked disappointed.

The sheriff of Calypso’s Bosom was carried off stage while ranting about free speech, Charles Laughton and the many breasts to be found on the statue of Diana of the Ephesians.

“What’s he doing down here in the U.S. anyways?” Trump asked his secret service bodyguard who looked a lot like KAOS agent Siegfried from the TV show Get Smart.

“I believe Justin Trudeau sent him down here on an important matter of Canadian national security,” the Siegfriedish bodyguard answered.

“Did anybody here get the licence plate of that ET gray’s space ship?” The Sheriff of Calypso’s Bosom asked as he was carried off on a stretcher.

“That makes perfect sense,” Trump nodded.

. . .

Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing was walking through New York City’s Central Park when he came across the Chinese vampiress secret agent Mei-ling Manchu who had been tied to a tree by Cthulhu the Great Old One who was currently in New York City contemplating a run for the U.S. Presidency.

“I hope I’m not interrupting the filming of some new type of reality TV show scheduled for the family viewing time slot,” Dracul remarked as he untied her.

“Are you the vampire hunter who’s into tantric sex?” Mei-ling asked after she was untied.

“I am,” Dracul answered.

“Take me now,” Mei-ling said as she threw Dracul back on a pile of autumn leaves and mounted him.

Rudy Giuliani dropped the legal brief he was reading when he walked by and saw what was happening.

-A vampire novel chapter 
written by Christopher 
Tuesday September 24th
2019.

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Netanyahu: When ET’s Friend Phones You Not Home

October 3, 2015 at 6:34 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, News, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Netanyahu: When ET’s Friend Phones You Not Home

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was sitting in the back of a diplomatic limousine in Manhattan after having delivered a passionate speech at the UN General Assembly in New York City.

At his side was the Mossad agent known as the Controller of The Golem.

The phone in the limousine rang.

The Prime Minister looked at the number.

He recognized the number of the U.S. National Security Council in Washington D.C.

“Hello,” the Prime Minister of Israel picked up the receiver.

“Mr. Prime Minister, this is a friend,” the voice said, “you must give up all control over the Temple Mount and East Jerusalem itself.”

“Who is this?” The Israeli Prime Minister demanded to know.

“And you must give up all control over the West Bank,” the voice said, “We know this was part of the land promised to you by The Lord God of Israel but he’s just an extraterrestrial- an astronaut from another world – He’s not the Supreme Creator of the Universe. We have the evidence to prove it which we will share with you at a future date. But in the meantime don’t hold on to the Temple Mount, East Jerusalem and settlement areas in the West Bank areas as if they were part of some divine mandate.”

“Who is this?” The Prime Minister was furiously angry.

The phone clicked.

And went dead.

The Prime Minister looked over at the Controller of The Golem.

“It was probably a hacker/prankster with a really bad sense of humour, Mr. Prime Minister,” the Controller assured him, “one who’s watched one too many episodes of that American TV program Ancient Aliens.”

“Maybe,” the Prime Minister looked thoughtful, “or maybe something much more sinister.”

Outside the limousine, some New York City doomsayer held up a placard that bore a verse from II Thessalonians Chapter 2, “And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie.” -II Thessalonians 2: 11.

A billboard across the street read, “God was just an astronaut.”

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday October 1st
2015.

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The Red Horse

January 31, 2014 at 8:27 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, Poetry, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

The Red Horse

The ancient Babylonian Vampiress Lilith
bit Ukraine’s President Viktor Yanukovych on the neck
and he fell into a deep sickness
and the Ukrainian government did announce that he was taking sick leave.

And the Red Horse rode into the desert
kicking up a storm
And even the children of the desert
found it a little warm.
The dust from the hooves swirled and twirled forming a cloud so vast
That even the vultures wondered what has come to pass?

The Syrian Peace Talks in Geneva ended in collapse
so the UN mediator hailed it a success
causing the dogs of war to laugh.

And the Red Horse rode into the desert
kicking up a storm
And even the children of the desert
found it a little warm.
The dust from the hooves swirled and twirled forming a cloud so vast
That even the vultures wondered what has come to pass?

In Egypt the Muslim Brotherhood howled and raged and set off many a bomb
while Gen. Abdel Fattah al-Sisi said he might run for Prez ‘midst much aplomb.

And the Red Horse rode into the desert kicking up a storm
And even the children of the desert found it a little warm.
The dust from the hooves swirled and twirled forming a cloud so vast
That even the vultures wondered what has come to pass?

The U.S. says that Russia is simply not following the treaty IMF
while its own nuclear missile launch officers cheat to avoid the grade of F.

And the Red Horse rode into the desert kicking up a storm
And even the children of the desert found it a little warm.
The dust from the hooves swirled and twirled forming a cloud so vast
That even the vultures wondered what has come to pass?

-A vampire novel chapter
written in the form of a poem
written by Christopher
Friday January 31st
2014.

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