Miranda Singh Encounters The Greek God Ares

June 10, 2019 at 9:32 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , )

Miranda Singh Encounters The Greek God Ares


Miranda Singh is stopped on the steps of a Jerusalem shopping mall by the Greek god Ares

As Miranda Singh the Executive Secretary to the London-based billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set walked up the steps of a Jerusalem shopping mall, she was suddenly approached from behind by Ares the Greek god of war.

“Stop,” Ares had said to her, “Is it true that you have the invisibility bracelets of the goddess Kali in your possession?”.

As Ares moved in closer, Miranda kicked him down the stairs with one of her spiked stilettos where the Greek war deity hit his head on the sidewalk when he reached the bottom of the stairs.

He was immediately sent to cuckoo-land.

The Olympian dreamed that he was in a clockmaker’s shop in Switzerland where the clock maker was making a clock where Donald Trump came out by the hour and said, “Cuck-hoo! Cuck-hoo!”.

Miranda Singh had been given the heads up by her employer Set that she might be approached by a Greek deity.

Apparently Set Enterprises’ Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster had received a vision that the deities of Mount Olympus were very interested in the upcoming Middle East security summit that would be held in Israel between the Israeli, U.S. and Russian national security advisors.

Miranda Singh would be covertly attending the summit by wearing the invisibility bracelets of the goddess Kali.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday June 10th 
2019.

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Harvey Tallbanger Knocks Out Zeus With A Lightning Bolt

June 9, 2019 at 9:54 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, Romance, Spy Tales, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Harvey Tallbanger Knocks Out Zeus With A Lightning Bolt

The gypsy Esmeralda had just finished a dance and was sitting in a corner of Quasimodo’s Cafe in Paris.

Suddenly she was approached by the Greek god Zeus.

“Howdy,” said Zeus who had been sitting up at the bar and shooting the breeze with a Texas oilman, “How would you like to see my Olympian sized Greek sausage?”.

The deity started to raise his Greek toga.

“Be a gentleman,” said the 6 foot 8 tall invisible Welsh pooka bunny rabbit secret agent Harvey Tallbanger who hit Zeus over the head with one of his own lightning bolts that he had left behind in an Adidas bag full of lightning bolts next to his stool.

As Zeus hit the floor, he moaned, “That’s the first time in history I’ve been hit by one of my own lightning bolts. And by a bunny rabbit at that.”

“By a very tall bunny rabbit though,” Esmeralda said as she sipped a Harvey Wallbanger allowing her to see the usually invisible (to mortals) bunny rabbit.

“I’ll be the laughing stock of the Vegreville summit,” Zeus sighed, “Vegreville being to the gods and goddesses of the world’s nations – the Greeks, the Norse, the Egyptian, the Celtic, the Phoenician, Babylonian etc. what the Davos summit is to mortal men and women.”

“You gods and goddesses meet yearly in the city of Vegreville, Alberta, Canada?” Harvey Tallbanger was shocked, “In the name of God, why?”.

“I hear Vegreville has the world’s tallest Easter egg,” Esmeralda pointed out.

“Well it wasn’t me who laid it,” Harvey the rabbit said in his own defense.

“It may have been me,” Zeus remarked before succumbing to unconsciousness as a result of being hit by one of his own lightning bolts.

. . .


The Greek goddess Hera

“I have the feeling my husband Zeus is once again up to no good,” the Greek goddess Hera remarked to private eye Carson Cody Albion.

Years before, Hera had hired Albion to spy on her horny husband and now she was doing so again.

“What makes you think so?” Albion lit himself a cigarette.

“Well,” Hera got up from her chair, turned around and looked at Albion:

“We were at the 75th Anniversary celebrations of D-Day on Juno Beach last Thursday,” Hera explained and smoothed the top of the chair, “Juno Beach was named after me, you understand? Or at least the Roman side of my persona. Donald Trump had just signed his name at the top of the 75th Anniversary D-Day proclamation whereas every other world leader present had signed their name at the bottom when Zeus told me, he had to get back to Paris for some reason and he wasn’t talking about the long dead Trojan who had slain Achilles with an arrow to the foot.”

“You suspect he’s got something going on in Paris?” Albion closed his notebook and put it in his pocket.

“I do,” said the goddess as she fanned herself.

Albion marvelled at how in the past 2 minutes, Hera was able to make clothing changes even faster than Japanese pop music superstar Moritaka Chisato.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday June 9th
2019.

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Theodora and Varying Manners of Byzantine Intrigue

May 7, 2019 at 10:01 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Gothic romance, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

After lighting a candle to the Baphomet and the statue of Baal, Pennsylvania Democratic representative Brian Sims of Philadelphia went to bed.

After falling asleep, the Byzantine vampiress Theodora appeared in his bedroom and sprinkled him with Byzantine angel dust.

Sims then dreamed that he was a homosexual bishop back in the days of the Byzantine Emperor Justinian.

Justinian’s method of dealing with homosexual bishops was vastly different from that of Pope Francis.

His method was to castrate the bishops and then to have them paraded nude through the streets of Constantinople.

Instead of a “coming out” parade, it was a “coming off” parade.

Sims screamed as he slept.

He was not enjoying his dream.

Theodora smiled and laughed.

She was.

. . .

French President Emmanuel Macron was unhappy that Britain was going to be participating in European Parliament elections later this month since the Brits had failed yet another deadline to achieve Brexit.

He ate smoked oysters and downed champagne.

He then got on his iPhone and went to FaceTime.

British Prime Minister Theresa May was unhappy that Britain was going to be participating in European Parliament elections later this month since the Brits had failed yet another deadline to achieve Brexit.

She ate hot buttered biscuits and downed gin.

She then got on her iPhone and went to FaceTime.

May shrieked when she looked at her screen.

Emmanuel Macron was only wearing brief undershorts that were decorated with pink coloured daisies and that was it.

Macron shrieked when he looked at his screen.

Theresa May was only wearing hair curlers and that was it.

May gasped, “Emmanuel, we’ve got to stop FaceTiming like this.”

. . .

Miranda the mermaid had shapeshifted into full human form and was lying on the beach at Tel Aviv.

The Greek god Poseidon stepped up out of the ocean.

He had a large seashell to his ear since he was in a teleconferencing call with his brothers Zeus and Hades.

Poseidon ended the call and put the seashell in the back seat of his pants which were made out of seaweed.

“Miranda,” the Greek sea deity called out to the mermaid, “Did you know the ghost of Orson Welles is looking for you?”.

. . .

After filling the Baphomet and Baal worshipping Rep. Brian Sims of Philadelphia with the worst possible nightmares, the Byzantine vampiress Theodora returned to New York City for a nighttime modelling photo shoot.

Where an MI-6 spy operative code named Diablos Nocturna was waiting for her.

They spent a tantalizing evening of tantric sex afterwards.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday May 7th
2019.


The Byzantine vampiress Theodora: The stuff of nightmares to Baal and Baphomet worshippers.
But pleasant dreams to certain MI-6 operatives.

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Roast Basilisk In Hell’s Kitchen

April 19, 2019 at 10:43 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Gothic romance, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Romance, Spy Tales, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

The Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec and Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing flying the winged horse Pegasus had won the showdown in the Libyan desert with the basilisk Basilisk Wrathsbone and his rider the dark arts practicing Jesuit priest Father Caiaphas bar Yochai this past Wednesday.

The ghost of Howard Cosell had been on the scene doing commentary for the underworld based Baphomet Broadcasting Network until he succumbed to spectral laryngitis.

Qonzilqointec had doused the basilisk Basilisk Wrathsbone with Odour of Weasel Perfume sending the genetically recreated satanic beast plunging to its death in the desert sands.

The evil Jesuit Father Caiaphas bar Yochai had survived the fall due to the combination of basilisk venom and extra strong Starbucks dark roasted coffee he had imbibed prior to combat.

The evil priest was not to get off scott free however for Dracul Van Helsing had used the Sword of Saint George to stab the Baphomet worshipping cleric in his phallus.

After Dwayne the Rock Johnson arrived on the scene to declare Qonzilqointec and Dracul the winners, the couple flew off to the Queen Cleopatra Hotel in Alexandria where they spent an evening of tantric sex together.

Star Wars Star Troopers had arrived from Set Enterprises in London to return the basilisk’s body to Britain.

Father Caiaphas bar Yochai managed to catch an Uber ride with an Islamic State terrorist to Paris, France.

There the now swordless Jesuit looked up the ancient Egyptian vampiress Isis since she had previous experience in creating wooden phalluses having created one for her husband Osiris since that was the one part of his 14 missing body parts (after he was dismembered by their brother Set) that she was unable to find.

The American Jesuit priest Father James J. Martin SJ held a Requiem Mass for Father Caiaphas’ fleshly phallus as he had rather fond memories of it.

The basilisk’s body was delivered to Chef Gordon Ramsay and some of his previous winners on the TV program Hell’s Kitchen.

The Rothschilds and some of their business associates were holding a buffet luncheon dinner this Good Friday in London and thought roast basilisk would be just the thing.

Chef Gordon Ramsay and his Hell’s Kitchen crew were brought in to prepare it.

“It tastes like chicken,” one of the Rothschild associates remarked.

“That’s because basilisk is part rooster as well as part serpent,” Chef Gordon Ramsay explained.

Meanwhile the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set was worried whether his company would face a law suit as his company’s chief scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher was responsible for creating this basilisk that caused the fire at Notre Dame this past Monday April 15th 2019 when the basilisk Basilisk Wrathsbone (driven by the evil Father Caiaphas bar Yochai) breathed venomous fire on repair scaffolding at the cathedral.

However no one on the Paris scene suspected a basilisk as basilisks really hadn’t been around for the past 500 years until Dr. Cadbury Rocher recreated one.

Meanwhile over in France, the ancient Greek god Zeus was having a meeting with French President Emmanuel Macron.

“Monsieur le Presidente,” Zeus spoke impeccable French as he had spent the greater part of the Age of Louis XIV deflowering the loveliest of the French courtesans before the Sun King had the chance to do so, “you may not know this but Notre Dame was built over the site of a Temple of Jupiter. Jupiter was of course the name under which the ancient Romans worshipped me. So I was wondering if you could place a replica of my altar at Pergamum at the top of the new Notre Dame where the old spire and Cross used to be before it collapsed in the towering inferno.”

President Macron, who was busy mentally calculating the age of Zeus’ wife Hera and figuring that she must still be a pretty good looking woman judging from her statues, replied, “Why don’t we discuss this over souvlaki and ouzo?”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday April 19th
2019.


The Greek goddess Hera: Still an extremely good looking woman

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Athena and Dracul In Edinburgh

March 28, 2019 at 9:56 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, love, Mythology, News, Romance, Spy Tales, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )


“And so how are your travels across the annals of time going?” The Greek goddess Athena asked Dracul Van Helsing as he stoked the fires in the Edinburgh hotel room they were in.

“Well, last night I was in Havana Cuba in 1956 and I saw Pat Nixon’s Rockefeller bought mink coat won in a card game in a U.S. Mafia owned casino,” Van Helsing answered.

“My owl tells me that you spent quite the enchanted evening with Isabel Esmeronde the Cuban singer extraordinaire who won that card game,” Athena looked accusingly at Van Helsing.

“Your owl is quite the time traveling spy,” Van Helsing lit a cigarette.

“He is,” Athena acknowledged.

“And now he’s flying around the British House of Commons as the Brexit fracas is going on,” Van Helsing looked at the TV screen which showed an owl caught in the Speaker’s hair.

“He finds human follies and foibles quite amusing,” Athena helped herself to some grapes.

“I see you’re in touch with the Scottish independence movement should Brexit go ahead,” Van Helsing sat down on the sofa.

“They don’t call Edinburgh the Athens of the North for nothing,” Athena smoothed her dress.

“And you’re looking after the Athens of the North?” Van Helsing thought of the Grecian columns of the National Monument on Calton Hill.

“I am,” Athena nodded, “My father’s Kraken is now swimming in the North Sea.”

Van Helsing in his mind pictured Liam Neeson as Zeus saying “Release the Kraken!” and Mel Gibson as William Wallace standing on a cliff above the sea and shouting “I am William Wallace!”.

He wondered who would win that battle.

“I hear you shot and killed your time traveling adversary the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau vampire Franz Kohler with a silver bullet,” Athena smiled.

“I did,” Van Helsing took a sip of his Scotch, “Unfortunately the immortal Egyptian priest scientist Imhotep brought him back from the dead and so he’s once again Undead.”

“And Imhotep seems to have the backing of the Egyptian god Thoth for whatever reason,” Athena rubbed her lip in thought.

“He appears to,” Van Helsing acknowledged.

“And with the secret diary of Solomon in your possession, you enter into the machinations of gods and goddesses,” Athena looked at the Canadian vampire hunter.

Van Helsing put down his Scotch, “I wasn’t aware you knew of that diary’s existence. I guess Solomon’s secret diary isn’t as secret as I thought.”

“As the Greek goddess of wisdom, I appreciated the wisdom of Solomon,” Athena stood up, “so of course I knew of his diary’s existence.”

Van Helsing stood up.

“The sun is setting,” the vampire hunter looked out the window.

In the distance, the Union Jack could be seen flying along Scotland’s national flag.

“I’d appreciate a kiss before bedtime,” Athena licked her lips.

And lips of Greek goddess and vampire hunter touched.

Followed by embracing of arms.

Miles away in the North Sea, the Kraken swam.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday March 28th
2019.

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Lakota Sioux Princess Tanaka, Kraken Tutsokiua and Mother Goddess Gaia

January 26, 2019 at 11:56 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )


The immortal Lakota Sioux Princess Tanaka stood on the shores of Upper Waterton Lake in Waterton Lakes National Park in southern Alberta on the Alberta-Montana Canada-U.S. border.

Accompanied by her two spirit wolf protectors, she held in her hand a transparent glowing red apple.

As she held the strange looking fruit in her hands, she spoke to the West Wind (who could not be seen but whose presence could be felt), “The kraken Tutsokiua (Tutsokiua is the Blackfoot First Nations word for “devil” -Editor’s note) has awakened from its sleep at the bottom of this lake where it has slept for the past 5000 years.”

The West Wind stopped in its tracks.

“And it has been giving these supposed apples of knowledge to various people,” Tanaka spoke in a whisper.

The West Wind let out a wild howl to which the immortal Lakota Sioux Princess Tanaka’s two spirit wolf protectors raised their ears but did not answer in reply.

. . .

A group of wealthy and powerful influential U.S. Republican party figures were out hunting deer on this particular day.

Hunting deer out of season.

As one Republican fired at a doe and her fawn, at the very same instant the spirit of the Mycenaean king Agamemnon let out an anguished cry while roasting on his spit down in Tartarus.

The group of Republicans moved in for a closer look.

To see if the doe had been slain.

As they moved in, they saw the one-eyed Germanic god Wotan standing there.

From a distance, the Celtic horned god Cernunnos (part human and part stag) fired at them with his crossbow.

“Shit,” Wotan cried as he fell backwards with the arrow stuck in his one good eye.

. . .

The Greek god Zeus was in the office of Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan.

On speaker phone for the meeting were Russian President Vladimir Putin, Iranian President Hassan Rouhani and Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro.

“By the way,” Zeus spoke in the manner of general chit chat, “did you know that the mother goddess Gaia who is the caretaker of earth is in fact not Greek but Lakota Sioux?”.

Gaia is Lakota Sioux.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
January 26th 2019.

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Artemis, Dracul and What Happened To The Deerslayer’s Daughter

January 22, 2019 at 11:56 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Gothic romance, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Theatre Arts, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )


The Greek goddess Artemis performing in New York City’s Ziegfeld Follies in 1927

The Greek goddess Artemis had wanted to act in a Ziegfeld Follies production ever since she saw her first one in 1910.

As she was getting her photo taken to appear on the theatre marquee, she noticed a tall blonde man approach her.

She recognized the man as being Dracul Van Helsing a vampire hunter said to have the ability to travel through time according to a vision given her brother Apollo’s prophetess at Delphi.

“Mr.Van Helsing,” the goddess in mini dress, black silk fishnet pantyhose and high heeled shoes smiled at him,

“What brings you here?”.

“I’m here to negotiate a happy ending,” the man answered.

In the theatre lobby, screams were being heard as the requests of Dracul’s blue eyed white wolf and silver eyed black jaguar for hot dogs and coke were not understood by the theatre lobby vendor who was from Brooklyn.

“A happy ending to this particular Ziegfeld production,” Artemis raised one of her legs in Dracul’s direction and pointed at him, “but the script is a musical comedy.”

“No, a happy ending to the tale of Agamemnon and Iphigenia,” Dracul answered referring to the story of King Agamemnon sacrificing his daughter Iphigenia at Aulis as a human sacrifice to Artemis so that she would allow fair winds for the Greek ships to be able to sail for Troy.

Agamemnon being an ass had slighted Artemis the Greek goddess of the hunt by killing one of the goddess’ deer in a sacred grove.

He was forced to sacrifice his daughter to Artemis as punishment to allow the Greek ships to sail to Troy.

Again being the supreme ass he was, he preferred sacking Troy for its gold than his young daughter living (although the official reason for war was to take Helen from Paris and return her to her husband King Menelaus).

“You want me to travel back in time and allow Iphigenia to live?” Artemis raised her other leg at Dracul, “what will you give me in return?.”

“Tantric sex,” Dracul answered.

Artemis smiled.

“That’s the answer I wanted to hear,” she ran her hands through her hair, “All right, Iphigenia will live but Clytemnestra the mother of Iphigenia must still think she was killed by Agamemnon because the fates have decreed that Clytemnestra and her lover must kill her husband King Agamemnon.”

“I care not for the butcher of Troy,” Dracul replied.

“All right,” Artemis laughed, “Funny my father Zeus warned me that I would lose my virginity if I ever appeared in a Ziegfeld Folly. I guess he was right.”

She giggled and opened her legs for the time travelling vampire hunter.

That was the night that the lights went out on Broadway as a huge surge of electricity sent everything black in the Big Apple.

Meanwhile 14 years later in 1941, Princess Iphigenia of Mycenae suddenly appeared on the bear skin rug of Carson Cody Albion Private Eye in Los Angeles, California:

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday January 22nd
2019.

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Pan Goatee’s Twin Sister, Edgar Allan Poe, Robert E. Lee, The Mermaid and The Kraken: A Poem

January 19, 2019 at 11:58 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, History, International Intrigue, Literature, love, Mystery/horror, Mythology, News, Poetry, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )


DARPA Contract assassiness Panty Goatee disguised as the Dragon Warrioress Crown Princess Lenora of Lemuria appearing to Edgar Allan Poe on the day of his death October 7th 1849

‘Twas the night before the Super Wolf Blood Moon
and all through the earth, strange creatures were stirring
and at the CERN Large Hadron Collidor in Switzerland
Shiva and Kali danced the Dance of Death
because of the foolishness of foolish mortals
DARPA and CERN had teamed up to send
Pan Goatee’s genetically cloned twin sister
the beautiful Panty Goatee back in time
to Baltimore Maryland on October 7th 1849
disguised as Poe’s immortal love
the Dragon Warrioress Crown Princess Lenora of Lemuria

They were sending Panty back as Lenora
On this date of January 19th 2019
on what would have been Poe’s 210th birthday
if he had been still alive or had become an immortal

So as the full moon cast a mysterious looking lunar rainbow
Down upon a cloud as snowflakes fell to Earth
Around the Swiss countryside
And Kali and Shiva danced a frozen version of Swan Lake
as the Greek god Zeus choked on the drumstick of Leda’s
duck a l’orange
and the Chinese moon goddess Chang’e laughed heartedly
while sampling the delicacy of Peking Duck sprinkled
with a little Soma lunar elixir of life
As her snow white jack rabbit hare friend ate carrots
and developed superior night vision.

Why was Panty going back in time as Lenora
to Poe on his death day?
It was a plan conceived by DARPA’S new AI robot
Built by a DARPA employee under the mentorship of Sophia
The Greco-Egyptian Gnostic goddess of wisdom
Unbeknownst to both DARPA and CERN however
the AI robot had come up with the idea
after being shortcircuited
when DARPA’s mascot Jefferey the otter
had poured a 40 ounce bottle of bourbon
down the AI’s metallic throat
because Jefferey thought the robot could use a drink.

As such both the drink and the plan
would spell doom to the best laid plans
of CERN and DARPA
Both should have stuck to building better mousetraps
And making plans to celebrate Robbie Burns Day
later this month.

Panty as Lenora approached Poe
The writer looked at her and whispered “My long lost love Lenore”
Then he whispered “Reynolds” as he saw the genetic clone
That the immortal Egyptian scientist Imhotep
had made of the writer and named “Reynolds”
Poe then croaked
and a raven outside the window wept bitter tears
As Poe would say “Lenore” nevermore.

Inside a Rome coffee shop
Abraham Lincoln’s ghost
And the ghost of Gen. Robert E. Lee
celebrated the Confederate General’s 212th birthday today
January 19th 2019
As the Egyptian god Osiris watched
Lincoln raised his cappuccino in a toast,
“Here’s to old enemies becoming friends again”.

And on a marble floor inside the Vatican was a gold ashtray
containing the gold plated figures of a mermaid and a Kraken
who were very much in love
The Kraken told his beloved mermaid,
I want this moment to last forever

His wish came true when King Midas touched them both.

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday January 19th
2019.

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The Clock of Thoth: A Poem

January 14, 2019 at 11:53 pm (Art, Arts, Film, Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, Gothic, Gothic poem, Gothic romance, History, International Intrigue, love, Movies, Mythology, News, Philosophy, Poetry, Romance, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )


Tefna listening to the sound of the Clock of Thoth tick.

The young woman called Tefna
was in her apartment bedroom
listening to the sound of
the Clock of Thoth tick

A clock designed by her father
A master clock maker
At the stroke and bong of each hour
Two figures would come out
The first was Thoth
The ibis headed ancient Egyptian god
Of the moon, magic and writing
And of course the Egyptian god who
was the recorder of time

The other figure was an Egyptian Pharaoh
who bore the likeness of the young
Actor/Director Orson Welles
The year was 1945
The date was August 6th
Feast of the Transfiguration
On the Church calendar
When Christ showed his Divine Deity
To his Apostles Peter, James and John

Tefna awaited news on what would become of her fiance
a sailor in the U.S. Navy still involved in the War In The Pacific
against Japan
Thor’s lightning bolt insigna warriors in Germany
had surrendered months earlier
but no word yet on those who fought for the ancient gods of Japan

A young American scientist J. Robert Oppenheimer
was seeking to become the Hindu god Shiva
The destroyer and transformer of worlds
But Tefna was unaware of him and his plans
And what they could possibly mean for her
As she listened to the ticking of the Clock of Thoth
On the wall
Tick-tock! Tick-tock!
As she always did at this same time every night
Before she went to bed

In the apartment next door
Hera the divine goddess queen of the Olympians
awaited the report of an immortal private eye
Carson Cody Albion

The Greek goddess Hera- that’s Juno to the ancient Romans!

She had suspected her husband Zeus
was getting it on with the modern goddesses
of the silver screen in Hollywood
The fact that she had heard him talking on the phone
seeking to borrow swan and bull costumes
from studio costume departments
only added to her suspicions.

In the apartment on the other side of Tefna
sat Hestia the Greek goddess of hearth and home

Hestia suspected that hearth and home would come to be neglected in America following the war
As both men and women followed Mammon
the ancient Babylonian god of banking and commerce
Who had helped America defeat Thor’s modern worshippers

All these things were unfolding in the building around Tefna
As she listened to the sound of the Clock of Thoth
tick on the wall

Tick-tock! Tick-tock! went the Clock of Thoth on the wall
As Tefna listened.

The Greek goddess Athena was there in black and white

on the silver screen
in the old repertory movie theatre
in West Hollywood
on January 14th
when Dracul Van Helsing
entered the theatre
and entered the screen
and then entered Athena
to sample hidden portals of wisdom

In the Dashwood Forrest Art Gallery in London
Dashwood Forrest looked at the painting
of Demeter
The Greek goddess of fields, crops and agriculture
looking down on a field of 19th Century French peasant women
Bringing in the sheaves for harvest

Looking at the painting
Dashwood Forrest was shocked to see and hear
Demeter speak to the French women,
What sort of powerful magician could seduce my Persephone
away from her husband

As Athena found tantric sex to be a tantalizing experience
On the silver screen in a West Hollywood repertory theatre
actress Akira Lane was showing a robotics maker
fresh from a technology show in Las Vegas
what wonders old technology could do
when blended with ancient magic
As an Irish Jewish science-fiction writer
George Finneganburg
hastily took notes

Meanwhile in a London casino
Former British Labour MP
The Welsh werewolf Magog Rhys Petley
(whose seat was now held by
British Transhumanist MP
Welsh vampiress Morgana)
walked in on an unexpected orgy
taking place on a casino table

The casino’s kinky quartet looked at him, smiled
and advised him not to miss Lord L’s
Super Wolf Blood Moon Party
in Washington DC
next Sunday night

with the brunette in short skirt and black silk fishnet pantyhose
Sitting atop the casino table
telling him not to miss it for the world

Renfield R. Renfield MP
had just finished writing his speech to move
a motion of non-confidence in Theresa May’s government
following the Brexit vote in the Westminster Parliament tomorrow
When suddenly he walked out into his Parliamentary office
waiting room
Where the Vietnamese vampiress Ho Babylon Minh

was waiting for him

Causing Renfield to burst the zipper on his trousers
When he saw her
He would have to buy himself a new suit
to deliver the speech in Parliament tomorrow

It was a moonlit night in Port Elizabeth South Africa
As the great South African artist SAREJESS
sat in the middle of the street with his easel and canvas
and paintbrush and paints
(praying that no motorists would be driving down the street this late at night to abruptly and undoubtedly painfully put an end to his lunar nocturnal painting expedition)
and painted what he saw

He would paint this quiet tranquil scene
before the ghost of a brontosaurus showed up
and walked across the street
And before the ghost ship of THE ghost ship
The Flying Dutchman
appeared on the surface of the water
on the horizon in the distance
As he sat there painting the canvas,
he wondered whether his wife and family were right
to think he was crazy

And there at one moment in time
somewhere in time
sat Tefna
always anxiously sitting on the bed
always anxiously awaiting for the phone to ring
to bring her news of her love
Same place
Same time
Night after night

but no sound of a phone ringing
Only the sound of the Clock of Thoth ticking
Tick-tock! Tick-tock!

-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday January 14th
2019.

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Atargatis The Whistling Gypsy

January 4, 2019 at 10:06 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

It had been two years since Carson Cody Albion had had the tantric sex encounter with Semiramis in New Orleans.

A lot had happened since then.

Semiramis tired of stalking the bayous of New Orleans as the Jaguar Woman of New Orleans had returned to her palace along the Euphrates River.

Carson Cody Albion had packed up his private eye business and moved to Los Angeles from New Orleans.

The Golden Age of Hollywood and the shenanigans of film studio executives and their wives and mistresses made for a more lucrative clientele.

One thing that still puzzled Albion about the Semiramis encounter was why the Jaguar Woman (and ex-Queen of Babylon) had suddenly clutched on to Thessalonike of Macedon (the immortal mermaid half-sister of Alexander the Great) and shouted “Mommy.”

He had found the answer while browsing through a Los Angeles rare bookshop.

He had looked up the name Semiramis in an old encyclopedia and discovered that she was the daughter of the Syrian mermaid goddess Atargatis.

No wonder why when Semiramis saw an actual real live mermaid, she mistook her for her own mother.

Albion left the bookshop.

He decided to head over to one of the Hollywood studio backlots looking for customers.

While walking through one of the backlots, he noticed an actress playing a gypsy woman taking a rest from filming.

As he walked by her, she whistled at him.

Albion turned around, smiled and doffed his hat to her.

He continued walking.

Little did he know that the whistling gypsy was in fact the mermaid Atargatis the mother of Semiramis.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday January 4th
2018.

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