Pan Goatee and Neb-Senu In Bethlehem

July 7, 2013 at 9:09 pm (The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , )

Pan Goatee and his friend the spirit of the statue of Neb-Senu had astral projected themselves to the town of Bethlehem in the West Bank.

Pan Goatee had not only taught himself the art of astral projection the past few weeks but had also recently mastered the ability to shapeshift into other human forms.

He shape shifted into the appearance of a West Bank Jewish settler and went into a Palestinian neighbourhood and slaughtered a bunch of Palestinian children.

He then shapeshifted into the appearance of a fighter member of the Fatah al-Aqsa Martyrs’ Brigade and went into a nearby Jewish settlement and slaughtered a bunch of Jewish settler children.

“Nothing like starting a shit load of trouble between people,” Pan Goatee shapeshifted into Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow and winked at Neb-Senu.

They then astral projected themselves into the doctor’s office of a hospital in Bethlehem to see what trouble they could cause there.

The doctor was out of his office but the TV was on and the satellite had picked up a transmission of an old 1960s American TV program Batman.

“Unholy smokeless fire, Batman,” Robin the Boy Wonder shouted to the Caped Crusader.

The jinn in the test tube in the doctor’s office thought he was the one being talked about and looked towards the TV screen.

That’s when he noticed the astral bodies of Pan Goatee and Neb-Senu.

The jinn (who was of the Marid variety of jinn) had been imprisoned in the test tube for a few months now.

He had been told in a vision that the only way he could escape was to get another entity to take his place.

The jinn noticed one of the entities appeared to be Egyptian and the other entity appeared to be a bad impersonation of American actor Johnny Depp as pirate Captain Jack Sparrow.

Inside the test tube, the Marid jinn shapeshifted into an alluring female Egyptian Sila jinn who sang a sweet song of seduction in Egyptian to the entity known as Neb-Senu.

Eagerly, Neb-Senu astral projected into the test tube allowing the Marid jinn to make his escape.

The Marid jinn quickly astral projected himself into the direction of the Mediterranean Sea.

When Pan Goatee saw that his friend Neb-Senu could not astral project himself out of the test tube, all he could say was “Oh shit.”

Pan then astral projected himself to a Gypsy crystal ball reader on London’s Carnaby Street for advice.

Meanwhile in another section of the hospital, Welsh werewolf British Labour MP Magog Rhys Petley in his booming Welsh voice said, “I declare this maternity ward officially open…”

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday evening circa 7 PM
July 7th 2013

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5 Comments

  1. The Dream of Dulcinea Lucia | Dracul Van Helsing said,

  2. Randstein said,

    What could be worse than thinking you were about to belly dance with a sultry test tube siren and then find your astral projection impotent. Oh shit, indeed!

    • draculvanhelsing said,

      Yes, it would be a real let down all right.

      • Randstein said,

        I actually felt a twinge of sympathy for Neb-Senu. No one should judge unless they spent some time in a test tube too. That is a growing demographic. Soon they may be a major force at the voting booth.

    • draculvanhelsing said,

      Yes, I have no doubt that the products of test tubes will be a major force at the voting booth in the future.

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