Render Unto Pachamama The Things That Are Pachamama’s

October 19, 2020 at 10:59 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, News, The Occult, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was reading the news on behalf of a BBC news announcer who had come down with a severe bullet wound after being shot by the husband of the woman he had slept with last night.

The announcer later died in hospital where doctors following WHO (World Health Organization) guidelines listed his death as being caused by Covid-19.

Renfield finished the newscast with, “And in other news, the Communist Pope Francis has decided not to name the anti-Communist Pope John Paul II a Doctor of the Church or a Patron Saint of Europe. Wow, big shocker there.”

Needless to say, Renfield had added quite a number of ad libs of his own while reading the newscast script.

When the newscast was over, he got on Skype with his friend Amadeus Emanon who was currently residing in Australia.

Said Amadeus, “I hear the Vatican City State Mint has issued a 10-Euro silver coin depicting the Inca earth mother goddess Pachamama giving birth to planet Earth.”

The coin showed an Inca woman with long plaited hair entwined with long ears of corn (representing the earth’s fertility) about to give birth to a globe of the world.

The coin designed by Bergamo sculptor and engraver Luigi Oldani was designed to mark the 50th Anniversary of the UN’s World Youth Day (which was first held on April 22nd 1970 on what would have been Lenin’s 100th birthday).

“That’s right,” Renfield nodded, “The French Jesuit priest Pierre Teilhard de Chardin noted in a 1922 letter he wrote to Lenin and Trotsky that the Inca Empire which lasted from 1438 to 1533 practiced a form of scientific socialism and that furthermore the Incas worshipped an earth mother goddess called Pachamama. It was Teilhard’s contention that through the use of Pachamama, he Teilhard could bring about a Hegelian synthesis of Catholicism and Soviet Communism.”

“And what was Lenin and Trotsky’s reaction to that?” Amadeus, who was normally always hungry, had pushed aside the plate of Uncle Ernie’s Meatloaf a la Hotel California that Uncle Ernie had made him.

“They told him good luck with that,” Renfield answered, “Lenin himself croaked in January 1924 and Trotsky himself was forced into exile from the USSR in February 1929 after coming out on the losing end of a power struggle with Joseph Stalin.”

“So nothing really became of Teilhard’s Pachamama synthesis of Catholicism and Soviet Communism?” Amadeus declined Uncle Ernie’s aptly named Jonestown Guyana Kool-Aid Cocktail.

“Not until Jorge Mario Bergoglio was elevated to the Papacy on March 13th 2013 and took the name Pope Francis,” Renfield replied.

“So anything else about this coin I should know?” Amadeus waved aside a cup of Uncle Ernie’s Outback Road Kill Brew Coffee.

“Well it basically shows the Ukhu Pacha- the mondo interno in Spanish giving birth to the Madre Terra in Spanish,” Renfield sipped a glass of wine.

“What’s that in English?” Amadeus inquired.

“Well the mondo interno is the inner world or world under the earth which gives birth to the world above the earth – Mother Earth- Madre Terra- which is the world of plants, animals, soil and humans,” Renfield explained.

“What does this inner world consist of?” Amadeus was curious.

“Well Ukhu Pacha is the inner world and is associated with the realm of the dead and as the realm of the dead, Ukhu Pacha is inhabited by the supay a group of demons which torment the living. Supay with a capital S is also the name of the Inca god of death – Supay – who is the ruler of the Inca underworld the Ukhu Pacha as well as the race of demons (supay with a small s) that inhabit it. The name Supay is roughly translated diablo (Spanish for devil) in most South American countries.
Pachamama herself lives in the Ukhu Pacha (inner world or world under the earth) as a fiery red dragon. When she goes above the earth in times of harvest, she becomes a beautiful woman. In effect, the red dragon gives birth to a woman who is Mother Earth.”

“Why does this sound exactly like the Book of Revelation or the Book of the Apocalypse to me?” Amadeus watched Uncle Ernie dressed as Mystery Babylon dancing around the kitchen in a slit skirted red dress and holding an overflowing gold cup of red wine.

“Because it is,” Renfield acknowledged, “Why Pope Francis doesn’t have a tattoo tattooed to his forehead that says “I am the False Prophet of Revelation Chapter 13″ is beyond me. The symbolism on the new 10 Euro coin there is for anyone who’s a student of Inca mythology to see. Perhaps he’s waiting for the Great Global Reset next year (which will happen if the Biden-Harris ticket wins in November) before he unveils that tattoo on his forehead.”

Pachamama: The Lady In Red listens to the whispers of El Diablo

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday October 19th


  1. Hetty Eliot said,

    Oh man… That’s actually not satire. That coin is real. I thought it was a joke but then I figured, well that sounds like Bergoglio so I looked it up and there it was… I’m still not 100% convinced that every single article on it isn’t satire.. But then I have to remind myself, it’s Bergoglio we’re speaking of here.

    • Hetty Eliot said,

      Btw the title of your post is hilarious. Very apropos for this week’s readings.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Actually most of what I wrote here is real and actual.

      The only satirical part (other than the shot BBC announcer’s death being listed as dying from Covid) is my Australian friend David’s adopted (fortunately for David not a real relative) Uncle Ernie handing out his unusual recipes and drink concoctions (which I understand are not so far from the truth) to my vampire novel’s fictional character of Amadeus.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Thanks. Glad you enjoyed the title.

        Yes, it ties in with this week’s readings.

        I remember when I lived in Vancouver and attended services at the downturn Cathedral, one of the priests whenever Bergoglio said something heretical (which was and is quite often) used to always reference the “Idol Shepherd” or “Worthless Shepherd” from Jeremiah 11:17 even though it was never part of the day’s readings.

        He did this every single time on a day when Bergoglio said something outrageously heretical.

        Too many times in fact to have been coincidental.

      • Hetty Eliot said,

        Yeah, Bergoglio pretty much writes this stuff himself. Good to hear that priest was doing his job.

        I made my own pachamama out of looseleaf and crayons, essentially the same quality as the original.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Yes, the original Pachamama in the Vatican Gardens was pretty ridiculous looking.

        At least the one on the 10 Euro coin is impressive looking- artistically and aesthetically speaking.

      • Hetty Eliot said,

        Honestly if someone handed it to me I would’ve thought it was the Sacagawea dollar coin.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,


  2. Sabiscuit said,

    I seem to be getting all the news from your blog, Christopher. Sorry about Karol, your dear friend. Francis is kind of a rock star. I’m totally biased because I’ve got a standing invitation to visit Vatican City for a glamping tour in one of the missions. And I want to meet him. πŸ˜†

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Glamping in the Vatican?

      Yes, I can see that happening.

      No doubt it will be an eco-friendly and environmentally friendly kind of glamping. πŸ˜€

      • Sabiscuit said,

        Close to the Vatican. It won’t be eco friendly. There’ll be a banquet, maybe some Pilates and definitely 80’s pop.

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        To say nothing of a vast assortment of Boy George and Elton John wannabes.

      • Sabiscuit said,

        I’m sure to meet a full cast of mavericks,

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        Be sure to get the autographs of Mel Gibson, Jodie Foster and the ghost of James Garner.

  3. Rachana Dhaka said,


  4. Jessica E. Larsen said,

    I love the entire post but the one that let me laugh out loud is the second paragraph πŸ˜‚ It’s so true, I’ve seen YouTube videos of doctors confessing of being pressured to this.

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      Yes, Jessica, it’s very hard to believe the statistics when doctors are being pressured to say a patient died of Covid when they didn’t.

      • Jessica E. Larsen said,

        I’d love for all the ghost of those death they marked “Covid” when they’re not to come back and hunt those responsible. Give them nightmare each night πŸ‘Ί

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        It would definitely do that, Jessica. πŸ˜‚

  5. David Redpath said,

    Amadeus was very wise.
    The last time Uncle Ernie served up
    his Meatloaf a la Hotel California
    we all foolishly gathered for the
    feast. Then tried stabbing it with
    our steely knives, but we just couldn’t
    kill that meatloaf βš”οΈ 😎

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      No, that beast refuses to be slain. βš”πŸ˜Ž

      All the while singing, ‘I’ll do anything for love but I won’t do that…”

  6. David Redpath said,

    You took the words right out of my
    mouth! It must’ve been when I was
    regurgitating Uncle Ernie’s famous
    Jonestown Guyana Kool-Aid Cocktail🀒

    • Dracul Van Helsing said,

      A good thing for you that you regurgitated it.

      I hear those who don’t wind up on the U.S. Democratic Party’s voter list in Chicago – as residents of a cemetery.

      I guess the benefits of that is you get to vote in multiple elections well beyond the lifespan of any mortal.

      • David Redpath said,

        When the dead and buried vote
        they get a mummified zombie 😱
        Just how Sleepy Joe got through
        the primaries, Uncle Ernie won’t
        tell me? But he does have a new
        special on his ‘Drug of the Day’
        menu called The Reanimator πŸ€”
        (as tested on fossilised swamp

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        The Reanimator- sounds like the name of a Halloween horror flick they’ll show on Netflix. 😱

      • David Redpath said,

        Premiering on Tuesday November 3 😱

      • Dracul Van Helsing said,

        With cameo appearance by Pope Francis as the De-Exorcist. 😱

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