Atargatis In Alexandria
In the courtyard of the Royal Alexandria Hotel
she sat
the Syro-Phoenician goddess Atargatis
on a late June evening in 1939
Although the sands of time
In various hourglasses
kept turning over
This way and that
The Egyptian god Thoth passed by
holding keys of Time
She saw a man named Quentin Talbot
encounter Thessalonike of Macedon
The half-sister of Alexander the Great
a couple of nights ago in the hotel ballroom
Then the scene shifted to a beach at Dunwich in Suffolk
where Thessalonike was about to sacrifice Quentin
to the old Celtic gods
on a June evening in 2020.
Dracul Van Helsing arrived to save Quentin
from being sacrificed
The next thing Atargatis knew
was she saw Van Helsing
making out with her own daughter Semiramis
In the upper bedroom
Of a Dunwich pub and inn.
Seated in an armchair and holding a spectral glass of spectral red wine
And watching the mortal-immortal sexual encounter on the bed
Was the ghost of Orson Welles
Who said,
Being a peep and watching this makes me feel like King Leer
A voyeur of some importance.
The scene vanished again
And she saw Adolf Hitler encountering Josef Stalin
In an Egyptian tomb
that had been transferred to the dungeon of Castle Dracula
in Transylvania
Hitler and Stalin were playing a chess game
For controlling America in the year 2020
The young Chinese Communist revolutionary Mao Tse-tung
dropped by
And told Hitler to use his white knight to crush a black pawn
Der Fuhrer like all racists
thought all Asians looked the same
And mistaking Mao for one of his Japanese allies
followed the future Chairman Mao’s advice
Stalin moved in for the kill
As Mao applauded
General Robert E. Lee’s battle flag of Northern Virginia
went up in flames across a map of the American south
Followed by the Stars and Stripes going up in flames
Across a map of the entire United States of America
Soon to be replaced by the Hammer and Sickle.
Atargatis leaned back on her chaise lounge as the combined scorpion and Phoenix fan above her kept her cool
A shadow fell across her.
She opened her eyes.
“Van Helsing, I presume?”
She said to the man standing alongside the chaise lounge.
Orson Welles’ ghost found himself in the Royal Alexandria Hotel courtyard
“Once again, I’m a witness… I’m a witness…”
He rang the bell alongside his chaise lounge
to summon the hotel porter to bring him a glass of red wine.
-A narrative poem
and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday June 27th
2020.
Saint John’s Eve
The last few days had been a haze for Quentin Talbot.
He had booked a room in the Royal Alexandria Hotel in Alexandria.
He had gone downstairs to the lobby and found himself transported back in time to 1939.
There had been a ball going on in the hotel ballroom.
He had gone in and met a woman who claimed to be Thessalonike of Macedon the half-sister of Alexander the Great.
Somehow Quentin found himself aboard a ship in Alexandria’s harbour.
Thessalonike had jumped overboard and turned herself into a mermaid.
Quentin then recalled something that a London art gallery curator and art dealer named Dashwood Forrest had told him.
There was an old legend that Thessalonike of Macedon had turned into a mermaid shortly after Alexander’s death.
The ship soon found itself off the coast from the Suffolk town of Dunwich on the North Sea coast.
Dunwich had been the capital of the Kingdom of East Anglia at one time and a major international port.
Its decline began when three great storms struck the town- one in January 1286, one in February 1287 and a third in December 1287.
Most of the buildings that had been present in 13th Century Dunwich including 8 churches had disappeared with the storms.
Local legend has it that at certain tides, church bells can still be heard beneath the waves.
Tonight as the tides surged in a great storm, Quentin could hear the bells ringing beneath the waves.
Quentin soon found himself being taken off the ship by dwarf like creatures.
Unbeknownst to him, the dwarf like creatures were korrigans from the Breton region of France.
At the same time over in Rome, another group of korrigans from Britanny were exiting a wooden statue of the Baphomet on wheels inside the Vatican.
Quentin soon found himself being taken down to the beach where Thessalonike (who had since shapeshifted back into human shape) was standing in front of an altar by a huge bonfire.
Thessalonike was dressed in the robes of a Druidic priestess and holding a huge sacrificial knife.
Quentin deduced that things weren’t looking too promising for him when the korrigans tied him to the altar.
A huge black dog with large red eyes, gigantic bared teeth and shaggy black fur came and sat by the bonfire.
The dog was that infamous Hellhound of English folklore known as the Black Shuck who was said to haunt the coastline and countryside of East Anglia.
The dog started to howl.
Of course, the Black Shuck was singing a song but to Quentin’s ears, it sounded like howling.
The song the Black Shuck was singing was, How Much Is That Human Sacrifice By The Window?
Coincidentally a stained glass window of Saint Elizabeth (cousin of the Virgin Mary) holding a baby Saint John the Baptist from one of Dunwich’s 8 lost sunken ancient churches had washed up on to the shore alongside the altar.
“Welcome to Saint John’s Eve 2020,” Thessalonike smiled a sinister smile at Quentin as she raised the knife.
“British Prime Minister Boris Johnson says you’re not practicing social distancing,” Dracul Van Helsing shouted as he aimed a crossbow and hit Thessalonike in the chest with an arrow.
“Shit,” Thessalonike started bleeding like a woman in a TV commercial for an obviously unsuccessful tampon product.
She headed to the ocean and dived in turning into a mermaid.
Gurkas from British MP Renfield R. Renfield’s personal British Army Brigade started wrestling with the korrigans.
Eventually Quentin was freed and the Saint John’s Eve Dunwich Human Sacrifice for 2020 was cancelled.
Van Helsing went to a nearby pub to have several cold beers while Quentin Talbot was taken to a doctor.
Inside the pub, Van Helsing was approached by the ancient Babylonian Queen Semiramis.
“Sticking your nose in where it doesn’t belong, eh, Van Helsing?”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday June 23rd
2020.
Renfield, Franz Kohler, Van Helsing, Hera and Zeus On The 75th Anniversary of Hitler’s Death
Renfield, Franz Kohler, Van Helsing, Hera and Zeus On The 75th Anniversary of Hitler’s Death
British MP Renfield R. Renfield was being interviewed by an independent radio station in Great Falls, Montana.
“So, what do you think of New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio attacking New York’s Hasidic Jewish community in one of his tweets because so many people attended a rabbi’s funeral in Brooklyn?” The interviewer asked.
“Antisemitism can now be added to Bill de Blasio’s long list of inherent stupidities,” Renfield answered.
“Turning towards economics here in America, as millions of Americans are now losing their jobs as a result of the Coronavirus lockdown, the ultra-wealthy elite such as Amazon’s Jeff Bezos, Microsoft founder Bill Gates and Berkshire Hathaway’s Warren Buffett have made an extra $282 billion in just 23 days of the pandemic, what’s your comment on that?” Asked the Great Falls radio journalist.
“In any shitty situation, the super rich always seem to come up smelling like a rose while the rest of us find our bones and blood and tears and sweat mixed in with the rest of the huge amounts of fertilizer dumped on all the middle and lower strata of society,” Renfield replied.
“Is there a way out of this pandemic and what does the post pandemic world hold for us?” The journalist inquired.
“Well Doris Day sang the answer to that question a lot better than I ever could in her song Que Sera, Sera,” said Renfield, “but I will say this, if you honestly believe that a perfect world can be achieved by the likes of Bill Gates, Pope Francis, the Chinese Communist Party, John Kerry, Greta Thunberg, Michael Moore and the whole Transgender movement, you’re crazy.”
. . .
It was 75 years ago today that Nazi Germany’s Fuhrer Adolf Hitler committed suicide only hours after he married his mistress Eva Braun.
What numerous assassination attempts over the years failed to accomplish, marriage succeeded in doing in a few hours.
. . .
“Shit,” Herr Franz Kohler of the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau said upon hearing the news that Der Fuhrer was dead.
“What is it?” His assistant asked.
“Ironically, with my twisted sense of humour, I had hid the secret formula for Vril energy in a room in the British Museum in London,” Kohler’s tears fell into his sauerkraut, “And now that we’ve lost the war, the Allies may find it.”
. . .
The Greek goddess Hera was standing in a room in the British Museum listening to a jazz rehearsal.
It had come to her attention that two time travellers – Herr Franz Kohler of the Nazi SS Ahnenerbe Occult Bureau and Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing – would be racing across the corridors of time to be the first to get to this room on this particular date in 1945.
Van Helsing was the first to arrive carrying his Houdini-Pantages-Tesla-Welles-Lamarr magic lantern film projector which allowed him to time travel.
“Glad to see you’re the first to arrive, Van Helsing,” Hera smiled at him, “Care to make out?”.
As Van Helsing was busy making out with the Greek goddess Hera, a blue eyed white wolf belonging to the Lakota Sioux Princess Tanaka carried the secret formula for Vril energy back across time before the SS’ Herr Franz Kohler arrived on the scene.
Meanwhile in a London hotel dining room, the Greek god Zeus was enjoying a feast fit for a king when the ghost of William Shakespeare came up to him and whispered in his ear, “Thou has just been cuckholded.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday April 30th
2020.
Norse Goddess Freya On The Canals of Venice
Norse Goddess Freya On The Canals of Venice
The billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set, Dr. Cadbury Rocher the chief scientist of Set Enterprises, British MP Renfield R. Renfield, Father Aidan Bury Saint Edmunds one of the Church of England’s leading exorcists, Peter Whitstable the Fox Mulder of Interpol and Australian outback based Amadeus Emanon were having another video conferencing discussion via Skype.
“Well, the economy will have to open up again gradually,” Set stated, “or the world is going to fall into a great economic depression from which it will never recover. Not of course that the Communists in the WHO, the UN, the Vatican or numerous national bureaucracies all over the globe care since a great economic depression is right up their Marxist totalitarian despot alley. But it will have to take place gradually not full speed ahead like the would be American Neo-Roman Caesar Donald Trump would have it. I think though all major public events all over the world such as sporting events, concerts, parades, rodeos and any other massive public gatherings will have to be put on hold until at least September 30th of this year. Let’s be realistic about that. If governments all over the world would say that, they’d be honest. After a while of extending lockdowns for 25 days after every 25 days which seems to be the way the bozos of our national leaders all over the world seem to be going, people are going to start getting cynical about the whole thing. There can be a gradual opening up of various businesses over the new few months. But any large events or massive public gatherings are out. Until at least September 30th of this year. And sadly maybe even beyond if necessary. But at least prepare the world for the fact that no major sporting events or parades or concerts or massive social gatherings are going to happen this summer of 2020. And not until a week after the autumn equinox after that.”
“If the governments of the world were honest, they’d tell people that,”
Renfield admitted.
“But are most of the governments of the world honest?” Amadeus asked as he ate a slice of pecan pie.
“No,” Renfield sipped from a bottle of whisky.
“Glad to see that we’ve got that out of the way,” Dr. Cadbury Rocher dusted some dandruff off his lab coat.
“What does Michelangelo the Psychic Lobster have to say about the world political scene?” Set asked Dr. Rocher.
“Well, he says that Joe Biden is not going to get the Democratic Presidential nomination this year,” Dr. Rocher wiped his glasses.
“Why not?” Set swallowed another live crocodile, “I thought Biden had the number of delegates pretty well sewn up including every other candidate (among which was Bernie Sanders) endorsing him.”
“Yes, but ever since January of this year, Michelangelo has had this vision of Joe Biden keeling over,” Dr. Rocher noted.
“Keeling over?” Set took a giant Rolaids tablet for his giant heart burn.
“Kicking the bucket, croaking,” Dr. Rocher explained as a frog hopped out of a frozen ice bucket of Corona beer behind him.
“Well, that would definitely upend the U.S. Democratic Party if that were to happen,” Renfield lit his pipe.
“Wasn’t Michelangelo the only being on the planet back in early October of 2016 who was predicting that Donald Trump would win the Presidency when all the opinion polls were showing that he was 20 points behind Hillary?” Amadeus asked.
“There was a geopolitical analyst who found himself having to live in a homeless shelter in Calgary back in the summer and early autumn of 2016 who was saying much the same thing,” Renfield was on to his second bottle of whisky, “And everyone was telling him that he was crazy. But like so often, his insanity turned out to be more accurate than everybody else’s sanity.”
“So who’s going to be the Democratic nominee?” Set bit into a marmalade laced scone.
“Michelangelo won’t say,” Dr. Rocher shrugged, “He’s keeping those cards close to his chest.”
“Michelangelo always was a Hell of a poker player,” Renfield was suddenly remembering that he still owed the lobster £10,000 from their last poker game.
“Anything else about the U.S. political scene we should know vis-a-vis Michelangelo?” Set bit into some homemade apple pie.
“The U.S. Presidential election may be postponed until a later date,” Dr. Rocher answered as the ghost of Nero started playing his fiddle in the background and the ghost of Julius Caesar started getting the blood washed off his toga.
. . .
The Jesuit priest Father Caiaphas bar Yochai stood inside the empty Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris and admired his handiwork.
A year ago yesterday Father Caiaphas had set fire to it while riding a fire breathing basilisk named Basilisk Wrathsbone.
Father Caiaphas laughed as he opened up his 1588 Latin edition of The Necronomicon and started saying a few prayers.
. . .
Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing had received an emergency email from the Norse goddess Freya saying that her stepson Thor was up to no good in this time of the Covid-19 pandemic.
They were to meet in person in gondolas on the now empty canals of Venice.
The Norse goddess Freya waited for Dracul Van Helsing in her gondola on the canals of Venice.
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday April 16th
2020.
Night of The Pink Moon Super Moon
Night of The Pink Moon Super Moon
Never an easy time to say good bye
As a pink toned rose moon rose in the sky
Against the rocks the surging tide rose high
Lovely scent of palms and South Sea air
And at the door stood a lady fair
Magical pink mist rose in distant cloud
In this paradise far from the madd’ing crowd
Sometimes worlds meet where they embrace and not collide
For life is more than a merry go ride
Heart to heart, heart to heart
Must kindred souls do part?
She Mahina the Hawaiian and Polynesian goddess of the moon
He Dracul of the earth’s mournful tune
Now on this night she must return home
Else she fade away like the ocean foam
Star crossed lovers under a rose hue sky
Where South Sea waves splash amidst mermaid cry
She turned around with last longing look
And to the heavens vanished leaving one night hunter forsook
-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday April 7th
2020.
Miranda Singh and The Wonderous Pair of Goldfish
Miranda Singh and The Wonderous Pair of Goldfish
“And in other news, Pope Francis has tested negative for the Coronavirus but remains positive for Communism… ”
Renfield switched over from Britain’s Sky News to BBC News where a friend of his was delivering the news:
“And the 600 year old Miraculous Crucifix of Christ that Pope Francis brought out to deliver his Urbi et Orbi message last Friday has suffered intense water damage as a result of the rainfall that occurred while the Pope gave his speech castigating the world for not following his globalist Neo-Marxist Neo-Bolshevik agenda and as a result the God of Surprises (the god worshipped by Francis) had sent this pandemic upon the world. Pope Francis gave this speech to the empty Saint Peter’s Square while standing comfortably under a large canopy in the pouring rain with his back turned against the Miraculous Crucifix of Christ that became drenched in the pouring rain being a great distance behind the canopy and the ancient unique statue has suffered intense water damage as a result…”
Renfield switched over to ITV News:
“Former British Prime Minister Gordon Brown has called for a One World Government in the wake of the Coronavirus crisis.
Minutes after he made the statement, a cream pie was thrown in his face by an invisible force.
Although a London bobby who had been drinking Harvey Wallbangers on the job says he saw a 6 foot 8 tall bunny rabbit with big pink floppety ears do it.”
. . .
The storm clouds descend
A beast has crawled from Egypt’s sphinx
towards Bethlehem to be born
A virus fancying itself as wise
has arisen from the East
and spread its tentacles all over the world
Offering gifts of pain, suffering and death
Instead of gold, frankincense and myrrh
in adoration of the new Messiah.
. . .
In the streams of a large conservatory greenhouse in London, Set Enterprises secret agent Miranda Singh saw two multicoloured goldfish that she had never seen in the stream before swim to escape a shark she had never seen in that stream before.
The goldfish leapt above a huge rock towards another stream.
The shark likewise leapt and landed on the rock hitting its head knocking itself out.
The shark then metamorphosed into the form of the Greek god Ares.
Ares still lay there unconscious.
The two goldfish then shapeshifted into human form.
One of them Miranda recognized as being Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing.
And the other she recognized as being Mahina the Hawaiian and Polynesian Goddess of the Moon.
They left the conservatory.
Miranda looked down at the stream and thought, “Oh brave new world that has such people in it.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday March 30th
2020.
A Banyan Tree Grows On The Moon
A Banyan Tree Grows On The Moon
Walking the streets of Honolulu in 1946
Was Los Angeles private eye Carson Cody Albion
He was on vacation
After having solved the mysterious case of the Blue Velvet Dandelion
back in LA
He walked through some of the crafts shops in the city
He noticed one belonging to a man who made ships in a bottle
Carson entered the store and looked around
He noticed one ship in a bottle that attracted his attention
“What ship is this?” Albion asked the craftsman
“The Santa Maria,” the craftsman replied
“The Santa Maria?” Carson looked at the ship in the bottle, “That was Christopher Columbus’ flagship in 1492 on his journey to the New World wasn’t it?”
“That’s right,” the craftsman nodded.
“I’ll take it,” Albion paid the craftsman
He walked out of the store and on to the avenue
An elderly Hawaiian woman was at a stand selling coconuts
The private eye looked at the coconuts but wasn’t hungry at the moment
So he didn’t buy.
“A Banyan tree grows on the moon,” the coconut woman shouted after him.
“What?” Albion walked back to her.
“A Banyan tree grows on the moon,” she repeated.
“Oh, okay,” Albion figured that the woman had been adding too much rum to her coconut milk
and decided to continue walking
“What are you planning to do with that ship in a bottle that’s in your shopping bag?” The woman asked him.
Albion wondered how she knew there was a ship in a bottle in his shopping bag
However he answered, “I don’t know”.
“Here’s a small piece of Kapa cloth,” the woman handed him just that,
“Take this pen and write on it what I have told you, “A Banyan tree grows on the moon”. Then put the Kapa cloth with the message in the bottle alongside the ship and throw it in the ocean where the waves will carry it where it may.”
It was a strange request but Albion felt compelled to comply
That night as the Hawaiian moon shone bright on the shore and sands, he threw the bottle with the ship, Kapa cloth and message into the ocean.
It was a late March night in 2020
The streets of London were deserted because of the countrywide lockdown over the Coronavirus
but Dracul Van Helsing had a paper signed by Boris Johnson
granting him permission to walk the streets
To rid the city of any evil nocturnal creatures
As Dracul walked along the banks of the Thames
He noticed a small bottle floating close to the shore
The vampire hunter picked it up
It appeared to be very old
And it almost had the appearance of having travelled all over the world
How did it wind up here on the Thames? he wondered.
He looked inside the bottle
He recognized the ship as being the Santa Maria
He pulled out the small piece of Kapa cloth and noticed the message on it
“A Banyan tree grows on the moon,” Dracul read aloud.
He went back to his London apartment
Carrying the ship in the bottle and its message with him
He went inside the room he used as an office
And saw this vision
“Who are you?” Dracul asked.
“I am Mahina the Hawaiian and Polynesian goddess of the moon”
The woman answered.
-A narrative poem
and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday March 29th
2020.
Yaldabaoth, Dracul, Sophia and The Brave New World
Yaldabaoth, Dracul, Sophia and The Brave New World
British MP Renfield R. Renfield was discussing with his former employer (and current landlord) the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set the curious political situation unfolding in Canada.
The Justin Trudeau Liberals had introduced into the House of Commons in Ottawa today an $82 billion bailout package to help the Canadian economy cope with the financial and economic fallout from the Covid-19 Coronavirus pandemic.
But included in the bill was emergency Financial Powers legislation that would grant Canadian Finance Minister Bill Morneau (or whoever was named Canada’s Finance Minister) power to raise or lower taxes as well as abolish taxes or establish new taxes until December 2021 without having to seek the approval of Parliament first.
Ignoring Patrick Henry’s statement that “Taxation without representation is tyranny” and George III’s desire to do just that to the American colonies led to the American Revolution.
The leaders of both major Opposition parties in the Canadian House of Commons- Federal Conservative leader Andrew Scheer and Federal New Democratic Party leader Jagmeet Singh while approving of the $82 billion aid package for Canadians did not approve of the Federal Financial powers legislation that would give the Federal Finance Minister carte blanche to rule the Canadian economy by dictatorial fiat.
Therefore they threatened to defeat the bill and being a minority government, the Trudeau Liberals were forced to withdraw it.
However the Trudeau ass kissing sycophants in most of the mainstream Canadian media such as CBC, CTV and Canadian Global News were presenting the news story in such a way as to give Canadian TV news viewers the idea that the Federal Conservatives and the Federal New Democrats were being heartless in wanting to hold up a $82 billion financial aid package that would help ordinary Canadians who were being laid off and losing their income in such extraordinary times.
But the trouble lay with the sneaky and underhanded Canadian Federal Liberals (who had always been sneaky and underhanded ever since the days of Prime Minister William Lyon MacKenzie King – a Canadian Liberal Prime Minister in the 1920s, ’30s and ’40s) who were trying to sneak in dictatorial powers to Canada’s finance minister which were an affront to representative democracy.
But the Canadian media just went along with the dystopian brave new world the Trudeau Liberals were hoping to create.
Today the Canadian government started running ads featuring Dr. Theresa Tam Canada’s Chief Public Health Officer telling Canadians the simple measures they could take to help prevent the spread of the Coronavirus.
Normally Government of Canada ads for the past 40 years always ended with a professional announcer saying “Brought to you by the Government of Canada”.
Today a Calgary based geopolitical analyst friend of Renfield clearly heard Justin Trudeau’s voice at the end of the ad saying, “Brought to you by the Government of Canada.”
So Justin was now becoming the voice of an Orwellian Big Brother in Canadian government advertising.
A Canadian Goebbels doing his own voice narration in the midst of a dystopian apocalyptic disaster film reality TV show.
As Renfield remarked to Set, “This pandemic will finally see totalitarian despots who have been in the closet finally coming out of the closet as the rest of the population are told to stay in their homes.”
. . .
Donald Trump meanwhile was telling a Trump ass kissing sycophant from Fox News that he hoped to see every American business establishment currently closed finally open for business by Easter.
“In other words, an American resurrection,” the Trump ass kissing sycophant from Fox News beamed like a moron in ecstasy on Ecstasy.
“Doesn’t that mean an American Crucifixion will have to happen first?” Thought Yaldabaoth the Irish leprechaun who was currently residing in a rustic country farm house in the American state of Vermont and watching the interview on television.
. . .
Meanwhile Yaldabaoth’s mother Sophia the Greco-Egyptian gnostic goddess of wisdom was standing on a rustic country road in southern Italy.
“Ciao, bella,” Dracul Van Helsing greeted her.
“Dracul,” Sophia was shocked, “Aren’t you ignoring what the WHO has to say about social distancing?”.
“I apologize,” Dracul answered, “That was a spontaneous reaction to when I first saw you just now. If Justin Trudeau finds out about this, he’ll be painting his face to look like mine.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday March 24th
2020.
Countess Draculina, Justin, A Gender Confused Wombat and A Pot Smoking Walrus
Countess Draculina, Justin, A Gender Confused Wombat and A Pot Smoking Walrus
Justin entered the mirror.
And felt the wet sand under his feet.
What happened to his shoes and socks he wondered?
The Basilides gnostic god Abraxas had them on his two feet (which were heads of serpents) in another dimension.
Walking through two inter-dimensional portal mirrors on the same night can cause stuff to go missing.
Which was always the noted Australian entertainer Uncle Ernie’s explanation whenever his g-string style jock strap fell off while he was on the stage in his drag queen show and the audience could see what he had (or lack thereof!).
Justin looked at the vampiress who stood before him.
“A little bird tells me that you’re the Countess Draculina the daughter of Count Dracula,” Justin spoke with his usual meandering manner of speaking.
Countess Draculina leaned forward and shouted “Boo!”.
The little hummingbird on Justin’s shoulder flew away.
“I didn’t know there was a full moon tonight,” Justin looked at the full moon and the Scottish castle behind Countess Draculina.
“That is an illusion,” Draculina laughed, “caused by a great searchlight (invented by Nikola Tesla) casting its full moon signal into the air.”
“Will signs and wonders never cease?” Justin used a fine tooth comb to remove gray hairs from his hair.
“Those signs and wonders will soon increase and increase,” Draculina licked the blood off her lips just as an Australian wombat (who was actually Uncle Ernie shapeshifting from another dimension) crawled up and licked the blood off her breasts atop her low-cut gothic attire mini dress.
“And what is the purpose of all these signs and wonders?” Justin asked as he inhaled pot smoke that was being exhaled by a pot smoking Arctic walrus that had just crawled on to the shore from the sea.
The ghost of John Lennon appeared on one of the high towers of the distant Scottish castle and began singing a paraphrased version of one of his old hits, “Imagine all the people worshipping the Antichrist… someday you’ll join us and the world will be as one.”
-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday February 24th
2020.
Searching For Wisdom In A Hall of Mirrors
March 10, 2020 at 10:59 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, Gothic romance, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Poetry, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (Athena, Dracul Van Helsing, Greek Goddess Athena)
Searching For Wisdom In A Hall of Mirrors
In a quiet room in London
Van Helsing sat
He looked over at his old black and white TV from the 1950s
That he had bought from a vintage antique shop
The TV was off
But he could imagine images on the TV screen
Pope Francis, like the Soup Nazi from the old Seinfeld TV show, wagging his finger and saying to the Catholic Faithful,
“No Holy Communion Sacrifice of The Mass for you”,
A girl with purple hair in a pink convertible singing her own version of an old Danish pop group Aqua song,
“I’m a Corona girl in a Corona world, it’s fantastic,
Our oceans are filled with plastic…”
Russian President Vladimir Putin proclaiming that 2024 (the 100th Anniversary of Lenin’s Death) will be year 0 for the new Russian Constitution
So since things are starting anew, he can run for 2 new six year Presidential terms
Allowing him to remain in power until 2036
Donald Trump waving off testing for the Coronavirus and saying,
“I’m so jealous of Vladimir Putin right now”
Justin Trudeau dressed as a blackfaced 17th Century Jamaican pirate aboard a ship
And singing his own version of an old sea shanty folk song,
“What shall we do with the Coronavirus?
What shall we do with the Coronavirus?
So earl-lie in the morning,
Way hey, up she rises
Way hey, up she rises”
And the Coronavirus rises as a beautiful woman
Holding a golden cup full of… wine?
(But Bela Lugosi’s Dracula does not drink wine)
And rising while sitting on a 10-headed 7-horned beast
Dracul wondered, Where is wisdom?
He found himself walking through the Hall of Mirrors
In the 1947 Orson Welles film
The Lady From Shanghai
Before the mirrors had all been shot out by some of the protagonists of that story
And there in one of the mirrors he saw
Athena, the Greek goddess of wisdom
So here is wisdom, Dracul thought to himself,
Lost in a mirror in a Hall of Mirrors.
-A poem and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday March 10th
2020.
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