The Siren of The Sea Plays A Sweet Melody: A Poem

March 13, 2019 at 10:16 pm (Art, Arts, Culture, Literature, love, Poetry, Romance, The Supernatural) (, , )


A Sea Spell 1877 by Dante Gabriel Rossetti

A great beauty was she
The Siren of the Sea
who played sweet melody

Her fingers played softly each tender string
And with melodious voice she did sing
Birds of the sea flew to hear her
Sailors landed on rocks just to be near her
So tenderly tenderly she played the cords of the lute
while caught in her long flowing hair was forbidden fruit
A garland of flowers adorned her head like a sacred crown
Luminosity shone like the sun off her golden gown

Oh divine beauty, how can it be?
I’m here with you, you’re here with me
when music plays like golden rays
And with tender eyes you gaze
Then on your lap, I’d gladly lie
as the sea waves dance to the seagull’s cry.

-A poem written by Christopher
Wednesday March 13th 2019.

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Semiramis In New Orleans

January 3, 2019 at 11:09 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

After Semiramis the Jaguar Woman shapeshifter (who claimed to be the ancient Queen of Babylon) created a scene in the Poseidon’s Trident Jazz Club where her dress came apart at the seams in the process, she returned to her hotel room.

Meanwhile Carson Cody Albion Private Eye had taken the mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon (the immortal half-sister of Alexander the Great) to meet a man claiming to be the Greek god Zeus.

Zeus had a hankering to make out with a mermaid and had settled upon Alexander the Great’s half-sister.

Trying to ply Thessalonike with drinks in Carson Albion’s office (which was a house on stilts in the water of a New Orleans bayou), Zeus was getting nowhere as Thessalonike kept refusing them.

Suddenly a woman claiming to be Hera showed up in the office and declared that she had found something fishy about Zeus’ story that he had gone to Louisiana for the shrimp.

Seeing the mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon standing there, she declared “There is something very fishy indeed.”

She then hit her husband over the head with the lobster attached to the front of Thessalonike’s dress.

Zeus hit the floor faster than a thunderbolt thrown from Mount Olympus.

Meanwhile Carson Cody Albion had gone in search of that elusive beautiful woman Semiramis for two reasons.

Reason number one: To return her dress to her (which he had picked up off the floor of the Poseidon’s Trident Jazz Club).

And reason number two: For personal reasons of his own (They didn’t call him the New Orleans Private Dick Horn Dog for nothing).

Albion used his own hound dog Methuselah to track Semiramis’ scent.

He wound up at her hotel room.

“Come in, Mr. Albion,” a sultry female voice spoke from inside the room, “it’s unlocked.”

Carson Albion entered the room and noticed Semiramis standing there next to a painting of a tiger.

She stood there alongside the painting with her fingers and finger nails posed like cat claws.

The smiling expression on her face resembled the smiling expression of the tiger in the painting.

How positively feline, Albion thought to himself.

As if she could read his mind, she lit herself a cigarette and blew smoke rings.

She then spoke with a voice as melodious as that of a midnight rhapsody, “Who ultimately wins when it comes to a battle of wits, Mr. Albion? Cats or dogs?”.

Carson Albion shifted uncomfortably on his gumshoe shoes.

“Your reputation as the New Orleans Private Dick Horn Dog precedes you, Mr. Albion,” Semiramis picked up her dry martini in a glass and stuck in her long tongue to the bottom of the glass and then sucked up the entire liquid with it, “why do you think I left the door open?”.

Albion started to feel hot.

And it wasn’t due to the usual mugginess of a New Orleans evening.

“What’s the matter, Mr. Albion? Why no words?” Semiramis put her catlike fingers on his shoulder, “Has the cat got your tongue?”

Semiramis put her tongue on his lips and into his mouth.

“How’s that for a taste of honey?” Semiramis laughed as she withdrew her tongue, “Could you be like John the Baptist and live on wild honey but skip the locusts?”.

Albion was by now totally speechless.

Totally aroused.

But totally speechless.

“Would you like to kneel at my feet as if I was a goddess, Mr. Albion?” Semiramis smoothed her dress with her catlike claws, “would you like to be my slave?”.

Albion got down on his knees in front of her.

Never would such a slavery be more pleasant than freedom.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday January 3rd
2019.

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The Mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon In New Orleans: A Carson Albion Private Eye Poem

January 1, 2019 at 11:55 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Poetry, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Out on the bayou
in an old cabin built on stilts in the water
was where Carson Cody Albion Private Eye
had his New Orleans private eye’s office

On this New Year’s Day in 1934
Albion had been visited by a white haired
and white bearded gentlemen
who claimed to be the Greek god Zeus
New Orleans was full of such nuts

Zeus was a client of the voodoo High Priestess
Mammy Del Rey

The beautiful and lovely Mammy Del Rey had been reading lizard entrails
for the said gentleman who said he was Zeus
Entrails to determine the whereabouts of the immortal mermaid
Thessalonike of Macedon (who was the half-sister of Alexander the Great)
said to be currently visiting the City of New Orleans

Unfortunately for Mammy and for Zeus
The Voodoo Priest next door
Grandpa Doc Duvalier
performed what turned out to be a successful Resurrection From The Dead spell
as the lizard entrails suddenly got up and walked away from Mammy Del Rey’s ashtray
and dived overboard from Mammy’s house boat cabin into the bayou below
where they were promptly swallowed by a fish

Thus the Mystery of Thessalonike’s whereabouts were now as great a mystery
as they were before Mammy started reading the entrails
So Mammy brought Zeus to Carson Cody Albion Private Eye for help

Mammy had picked up an image from the lizard entrails
prior to their unfortunate resurrection
Mammy drew an image in the sand for Albion
(Albion had a sandbox on his bayou house on stilts
which Louisiana Governor and now U.S. Senator Huey Long
used to play in
whenever he visited Carson Albion’s office)

Albion recognized the image as being the symbol on the matchbooks
given to smoking customers down at Poseidon’s Trident Jazz Club
rather than just giving this info directly to Zeus
The private eye said he’d take the case
and pocketed a fee from Zeus (Albion hoped that Greek drachmas
would be worth a lot in U.S. currency)

After giving Zeus a close-up view of the bayou
(by pushing him overboard)
and then making out with the lovely Voodoo High Priestess Mammy Del Rey
on his waterbed (this early prototype of the popular 1970s bedroom phenomenon had been invented by his good friend Nikola Tesla)
He then headed down to the Poseidon’s Trident Jazz Club

In his private eye trenchcoat pocket he carried a crystal ball snow globe
(containing the image of Thessalonike of Macedon) that had been given him by Mammy Del Rey
Thus he recognized the immortal mermaid half-sister of Alexander The Great right away

The immortal mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon (who was the half-sister of Alexander the Great) in a New Orleans jazz nightclub back in 1934.

The rare colour photo was taken with a little known instant photo colour camera the Teslatroid (the colour equivalent of the first black and white Polaroid cameras that were invented by Edwin Land 14 years later) invented by Nikola Tesla.

Any resemblance between the mermaid Thessalonike of Macedon at this New Year’s Day party in 1934 and singer Taylor Swift at her New Year’s Day party in 2019 is purely coincdental.

Surely thereafter Thessalonike was set upon by the mysterious Jaguar Woman of New Orleans
(a woman who was able to shapeshift into a Black Jaguar)
The woman who called herself Semiramis (like the legendary Ho Queen of Babylon) addressed the woman as Mommy Dearest before knocking her to the floor
In the ensuing fish-cat fight that followed
Semiramis’s dress came apart at the seams.


Semiramis: her dress came apart at the seams when she cried Mommy Dearest

To be continued.

-A narrative poem
and vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday January 1st
2019.

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Dashwood Forrest and Mulligan The Irish Zombie On O’ Connell Street In Dublin

March 18, 2018 at 10:55 pm (Comedy, Entertainment, Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Humour, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

Dashwood Forrest and Mulligan The Irish Zombie On O’ Connell Street In Dublin

Dashwood Forrest and his manservant Mulligan the Irish ☘️ Zombie 🧟‍♂️ were having breakfast 🥞 🍳 in a restaurant at a hotel on O’ Connell Street in Dublin.

Mulligan was nursing a king sized hangover having drank too many glasses of Kilkenny Irish Cream Ale on the Hill of Tara in County Meath for Saint Patrick’s Day yesterday.

He did give away one of his glasses of Kilkenny to a golden cobra named Maitreya who was undergoing an old Celtic Pagan ritual to make the snake the High King of Ireland.

But he did so in a hypnotic state (which would be the only possible state in which Mulligan the Irish Zombie 🧟‍♂️ would give away an alcoholic beverage that happened to be in his possession).

“If you don’t mind my saying so, you look to be in awfully bad shape,” the waiter said to Mulligan.

“That’s because I’ve got a hangover,” Mulligan answered while drinking tomato juice laced with three raw eggs 🥚 and Worcestershire sauce.

“You also look to be dead,” the waiter remarked as some of Mulligan’s decomposing flesh fell on his breakfast plate of kipper and poached eggs.

“I am,” Mulligan started leaking tomato juice and Worcestershire sauce from his armpits, “I’m a zombie.”

“If you’re a zombie, then why aren’t you sitting in the Dail (Irish Parliament)?” The waiter asked.

“There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t ask myself that very question,” Mulligan was debating with himself on whether or not he should order a Guinness as he noticed the old antique clock on the hotel restaurant wall was only 1 minute away from 12 noon.

“Who raised you from the dead?” The waiter asked.

“It was a South African witch doctor called Dr. Sterling Makabo who raised me from the dead,” Mulligan cut himself a slice of kipper and put it on his fork, “although he had actually been hired to raise my neighbour who was buried next to me in the cemetery from the dead but his corpse was still at his wake. A wake that apparently went on for fourteen days I might add. So when my neighbour did not answer Doctor Makabo’s call, I decided to do so. With the result that I’m now living the life of Riley.”

“Riley was the name of the man in the grave next to him,” Dashwood Forrest explained, “the fellow that Dr. Makabo was supposed to raise from the dead but his body was still at his wake as his buddies had been drinking so much, they forgot to take him to both his funeral and burial services.”

“Only in Ireland 🇮🇪 would this happen,” the waiter shook his head.

“I would have to agree,” Dashwood Forrest smelled the rose in his lapel.

At that moment on the television in the restaurant, the image of British MP Renfield R. Renfield appeared to comment on Vladimir Putin’s landslide Presidential election 🗳 victory in Russia 🇷🇺.

As Renfield pointed to a photo of Putin and made Freemasonic death by disembowelling gestures with his hands that would send YouTube conspiracy theory channel hosts into a whirlwind of frenzy, Mulligan remarked to Dashwood Forrest, “There’s the fellow who saved me from drowning in a bowl of punch at your mermaid 🧜‍♀️ painting art exhibit in London last year.”

“Was that before or after you became a zombie 🧟‍♂️?” The waiter asked.

“After,” Mulligan replied, “My mortal pre-zombie life came to an end when I drowned in a vat of Guinness.”

And speaking of Guinness, the antique clock in the restaurant struck 12 noon.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday March 18th
2018.

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A Mermaid On Boxing Day

December 26, 2017 at 9:00 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , )

A Mermaid On Boxing Day

Gordon “The Black” Donnelly had won his Boxing Day fight in the boxing ring.

He left the broken down warehouse where he had boxed and walked down to the pier.

He was covered in sweat and blood.

He reflected on the past 8 years of his life ever since he had been brought back from the dead by South African witch doctor Dr. Sterling Makabo.

As a boxer, he had fought in Ontario back in the 1880s and in California back in the 1890s.

He had retired from boxing in 1899 and moved to Honolulu where he died on June 6th 1910.

Dr. Makabo had raised him from the dead in June 2009 on behalf of a billionaire sports promoter who wanted to sponsor a boxer that would someday win the World Heavyweight Title.

And the promoter thought a supernaturally controlled boxer as in one brought back from the dead would be able to do that.

It was true Gordon “The Black” Donnelly had never lost a fight in the past 8 years.

But he still wasn’t seen as a contender namely because boxing was no longer the sport it once was.

UFC Fighting had taken away a lot of the promoters and big money.

Donnelly stood on the pier and looked down at the water.

He noticed the face of a startlingly beautiful woman staring up at him from underneath the water.

Thinking she was drowning, Donnelly jumped in.

Underneath the water, he noticed the woman was topless with a firm sumptuous pair of breasts.

He looked down and noticed the rest of her was one giant fish tail.

“A mermaid?” Donnelly thought to himself.

The shock of encountering a mermaid caused the living dead boxer to lose consciousness.

The mermaid quickly grabbed the unconscious boxer and dragged him up to the shore.

She administered mouth to mouth while in the distance a choir hired by a store for its Boxing Day sale sang, “Good King Wenceslas looked out on the Feast of Stephen…”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday December 26th
2017.

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Mermaid Miranda’s Revelation Part 2

May 20, 2017 at 3:42 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

“The reason,” Miranda the mermaid looked at Nathan the Controller of the Golem, “that the mermaid goddess Atargatis wants to destroy Israel is because of her daughter Semiramis. Semiramis has formed an alliance with the ancient Babylonian vampiress Lilith who, of course, has always wanted to destroy Israel and the Jews because she claims that the Babylonian Talmud maligned and libeled her good name.”

“Yes, Lilith once poisoned my Scotch whisky with polonium-210 while I was sitting in a London pub,” Nathan recalled, “it was Set Enterprises’ resident mad scientist Dr. Cadbury Rocher who saved my life with an antidote to polonium-210 that he invented.”

“I heard about that, Nathan,” Miranda looked at him sympathetically.

“But what caused Semiramis to form an alliance with Lilith?” Nathan asked.

“Her first husband Nimrod returned to Earth a few years ago aboard a UFO with a bunch of ET grays,” Miranda explained, “and the ship crashed near Tuktoyaktuk, Canada north of the Arctic Circle. Nimrod’s body was recovered and taken to a secret lab near Washington DC. Lilith stole Nimrod’s body and brought him back to life. Only the magic kiss Lilith used to bring Nimrod back to life went awry and the princely ruler of ancient Babel was turned into a little green frog. He now hangs out between the breasts of Lilith in her low-cut evening dresses.”

“Sounds like Nimrod has become every teen-aged boy’s fantasy come true,” Nathan thought aloud to himself.

“Is it every human teen boy’s fantasy to be like Kermit the Frog?” Miranda looked quizzically at Nathan.

“Um… no,” Nathan shook his head. “so I take it that Semiramis has formed an alliance with Lilith since Nimrod has become (ahem!) so close to Lilith.”

“That is correct,” Miranda nodded.

“And Atargatis in turn has naturally joined in alliance with her daughter Semiramis who’s aligned with Lilith,” Nathan was beginning to see the light.

The morning sun peered through the aquarium lab’s windows.

Meanwhile in Saudi Arabia, U.S. President Donald Trump had arrived with First Lady Melania Trump.
Donald and Melania Trump
Donald: I didn’t see any mermaids down in the desert sands of Saudi Arabia.

Melania: That’s probably because they’re swimming in the ocean.

Over in London, vampire hunter and MI-6 operative Dracul Van Helsing had received a phone call from Peter Whitstable the Fox Mulder of Interpol.

“Dracul,” Whitstable began, “I’ve been doing some research on the famous 17th Century Jesuit scholar Father Athanasius Kircher. He apparently had in his possession some ancient Greek mechanism that was the equivalent of our analogue computers.It also served as an orrery to predict astronomical positions and eclipses. But according to the diary entry of Father Kircher’s I’ve come across, the mechanism could also be used to locate mermaids. Sadly the mechanism disappeared on the night of Father Kircher’s death.”

“You know what, Peter,” Dracul leafed through the pages of his ancestor Captain Dante Van Helsing’s journal, “I have an idea where that mechanism is now.”

“Where?” Whitstable asked.

“It’s now called the Antikythera Mechanism and it’s to be found in the National Archaeological Museum in Athens, Greece.” Van Helsing answered.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday May 20th
2017.

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Mermaid Miranda’s Revelation

May 19, 2017 at 4:21 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

The mermaid who called herself Miranda had once again awakened in the salt water tank in the Israeli government aquatics laboratory in Tel Aviv.

The Controller of the Golem (a Mossad agent who went by that code name) came down to see her.

“Nice to see you awake, Miranda,” the Controller brought her roses wondering if a mermaid would like them.

She did.

She smelled them and smiled.

“Thank you, Nathan,” she said once again calling him by his first name known to few outside Mossad or the Israeli Prime Minister’s office.

“You’re welcome,” Nathan smiled at her.

Then she turned serious, “I landed on the beach at Tel Aviv to warn you and your people.”

“Warn us about what?” Nathan asked.

“The goddess Atargatis ancestress of all mermaids wants to destroy your nation,” Miranda looked grim.

Nathan knew his classical Near Eastern mythology.

Atargatis was a northern Syria goddess.

She was called Derketo by the Greeks and Dea Syriae by the Romans.

The goddess Atargatis fell in love with a mortal (a shepherd) and had a child by him- Semiramis.

One cruel day, Atargatis unintentionally killed her love and the father of her child.

Ashamed, she flung herself into a lake near Ashkelon and was turned into the form of a fish but the waters could not conceal her divine beauty.Thereafter she took the form of a mermaid- human above the waist, fish below.

Atargatis’ daughter Semiramis became a legendary Assyrian queen and was said to have been married to the biblical Nimrod (founder of Babel) and later Ninus (founder of the city of Nineveh).

A 19th Century Free Church of Scotland minister Alexander Hislop had several wet dreams about Semiramis inspiring him to label the Roman Catholic Church the Whore of Babylon and to write a book about the subject called The Two Babylons.

Nathan’s thoughts of his Ph.D Program in Classical Mythology at Cambridge University returned to the present.

“Why,” Nathan asked Miranda, “does the mermaid goddess Atargatis want to destroy Israel?”.

. . .

U.S. President Donald Trump was flying en route to Saudi Arabia when he was handed an NSA report that certain mermaids were plotting to destroy Israel.

Trump was angry when he read the report.

“How,” Trump blew both his top and his toupee, “am I supposed to tweet about this? Especially after I just called former FBI director James Comey a real nut job? And especially in lieu of the fact that polls indicate that some Americans think I’m off my rocker myself?”.

. . .

Dracul Van Helsing was reading the journal of one of his 17th Century ancestors Captain Dante Van Helsing.

The journal had been found floating in a wooden chest on the Aegian Sea after his ancestor’s ship The Virgil went down on his final voyage.

The last entry said that Dante had been turned on by the sight of sirens singing on a rock.

When he neared the rock, a mermaid who called herself Thessalonike of Macedon appeared.

Dracul knew that according to history, Thessalonike of Macedon was the half-sister of Alexander the Great.

According to legend, Alexander had found the Fountain of Immortality and had filled a flask of water from it.

He washed his sister’s hair with the flask.

When Alexander died, his grief-stricken sister threw herself into the sea.

Instead of drowning, she became an immortal mermaid.

When she encountered sailors, she always asked them the same question, “Is Alexander the king alive?”.

The correct answer in her opinion would be, “He lives and reigns and conquers the world.”

If given this answer, she would allow the crew and their ship to sail safely away in calm seas.

Any other answer would send her into a rage and she’d cause the waves to send the ship and every sailor on board to the bottom.

The journal entry ended with Dante saying that Thessalonike had just appeared.

Obviously Dante’s answer of Thessalonike’s question was not to her liking.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Friday May 19th
2017.

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The Mermaid and The Mossad Agent

May 14, 2017 at 3:50 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Vampire novel) (, , , )

The Mossad agent they called the Controller of the Golem received a phone call in his Jerusalem office.

A mermaid had been found stranded on the beaches of Tel Aviv.

The mermaid was now recuperating in an Israeli government aquatics laboratory.

The Controller and those in the know in the Israeli government knew there were such things as mermaids.

In fact, U.S. President George W. Bush had ordered a secret special commando raid on the city of Mosul early on in the 2003 U.S. invasion of Iraq in order to grab a rare copy of the Babylonian Talmud from a Mosul museum.

This particular copy of the Babylonian Talmud was the only one in existence where the existence of mermaids was specifically mentioned and acknowledged.

So the Controller wasn’t surprised by the mermaid’s existence.

He did know that landing on a public beach was a rare thing for a mermaid to do.

The Controller went down to the aquatics laboratory to see the mermaid.

“Hello,” the Controller spoke to the mermaid sleeping in the salt water tank.

“Nathan,” the mermaid opened her eyes and looked at him.

The Controller was startled.

For not many knew the Mossad agent’s actual first name outside a select few.

“Yes, I’m Nathan,” the Controller of the Golem acknowledged, “and what is your name?”.

“Miranda,” answered the mermaid and she promptly fell asleep again.

“Miranda,” the Mossad agent repeated the name to himself as he looked at the sleeping mermaid, “O brave new world that has such people in it!”.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday May 14th
2017.
Miranda The Mermaid

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Haiku About Mermaids

November 23, 2016 at 6:13 pm (Fantasy, Folklore, Mythology, Poetry) (, , , )

Haiku About Mermaids

Maidens of the sea
alluring and sensuous
beckon to unknown

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The Sailing Ship: A Poem

March 3, 2016 at 9:38 pm (Life, Nature, Poetry) (, , , , , , , , , )

The Sailing Ship: A Poem

Sail ahead to distant shores when yonder morning breaks
with wind at your back, listen to the cry that the screeching seagull makes
and sail on into waters of deep crystal blue
venture forth to destinations new
It is a time when the world is wide
so beckon to the surging tide

The mast is your guide
to horizons wide
white sails against skies of blue
they’re your towers- the world to view
and take the brunt of gray skies and stormy seas too

Poseidon’s realm stretches most of the globe
the sites to be seen- what tales to be told
Dolphins and Krakens, mermaids and sirens
aquatic femme fatales- they be a bitin’
Inviting you to Davy Jones’ locker- grave of missing Titan

This is the age of true adventure
where shark makes of mate’s leg a gaping denture
Whales spout
fish about
The salt sprays against your face
calm waters reflect an amazing grace

Today planes fly higher than eagles
Subs go lower than deep diving seagulls
Realms of pavement stretch from coast to coast
And space rockets soar high- making the air burnt toast

Speed here, speed there
instant speed everywhere
It should feel dizzy in this speeding vortex
but it moves so fast, we don’t even flex

Tall ships now exist only in books
or big toys built by would-be Captain Cooks
The seas are no longer the wild frontier
of siren call and mermaid tear
they are but memories of yesteryear

-A poem written by Christopher
Thursday March 3rd 2016.

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