Morgana: Playing The Role of A Vampiress of The Lodge

December 11, 2018 at 11:56 pm (Arts, Culture, Entertainment, Espionage, Film, Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, Ghost Story, Gothic romance, International Espionage, International Intrigue, love, Mythology, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )


The Welsh vampiress Morgana dressed in a Spanish style gypsy black dress raised her skirt and pressed a spiked stiletto high heeled shoe down on top of the vampire hunter’s chest.

The pair were in a parkade in London, England and Morgana was about to show the Canadian underneath her feet that her shoes, like Nancy Sinatra’s boots in that old 1960s song, were meant for walking.

And they were going to walk all over him.

“Van Helsing,” she said, “we have ways of making you join the Illuminati.”

She then brought her paddle down… and down… and down.

“Cut,” the voice of film director Orson Welles’ ghost shouted, “that’s a rap.”

Like many of his films, Welles shot this one in black and white.

It was actually a short propaganda film being shot on behalf of both the British government and Set Enterprises.

The purpose of the film was to convince Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman, an Israeli cabinet minister, a leading cardinal adviser to Pope Francis and the Egyptian vampire Osiris (all of whom were Freemasons) that the Welsh vampiress Morgana (British Transhumanist MP for the constituency of Newbridge in Wales) was a member in good standing of the Grand Orient Lodge of France and was torturing Dracul Van Helsing into joining the Illuminati.

Both the British government and Set Enterprises were hoping that this would allow Morgana the opportunity of entering into the confidences of the homicidal Saudi Crown Prince, the warmongeringally inclined Israeli cabinet minister, the kabbalistic cardinal who was being groomed as Pope Francis’ papal successor and the Egyptian god of the dead and the underworld all of whom were planning to rebuild the Temple of Solomon on Jerusalem’s Temple Mount.

The British government and Set Enterprises were hoping to discover how, when and why with Morgana as an informant.

Meanwhile as Morgana raised her Illuminati masonic lodge symbol decorated Spanish gypsy dress and lowered her black silk fishnet pantyhose, Dracul Van Helsing mounted her.

“Tantric sex, here you come again,” Orson Welles’ pet parrot Rosebob did his own paraphrased version of an old Dolly Parton song.

“Start filming again,” Orson Welles directed his camera crew, “Let’s see if I am capable of making the Citizen Kane of the porno film industry – Citizeness Cane.”

Orson Welles was still trying to exorcise the ghost of something that his former wife Rita Hayworth once said to him that led to their marital breakdown:


“All work and no play makes Orson a dull boy.”

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Tuesday December 11th
2018.

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Stone Altar To Jerusalem 3rd Temple Dedicated

December 10, 2018 at 11:54 pm (Espionage, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, International Espionage, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , )


A Russian girl picks apples from the Russian Apple Tree of Death in Sevastopol, Crimea

British MP Renfield R. Renfield was in San Francisco California along with the Vietnamese vampiress Ho Babylon Minh (the immortal granddaughter of the late Vietnamese President Ho Chi Minh and an intelligence operative for the Chinese Intelligence Service) in order to deliver deadly lethal poisoned apples (grown on the Russian Apple Tree of Death in Sevastopol Crimea) to Apple CEO Tim Cook in California’s Silicone Valley (not to be confused with the space between a California female porn star’s breasts) as vengeance for the U.S. government ordering the arrest of Huawei executive and Chief Financial Officer Meng Wanzhu in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada.

Already several U.S. and Canadian government officials had died under mysterious circumstances since the arrest of Meng Wanzhu in the escalating trade and technology war between the U.S. and China.

Quite possibly the last of Chief Papaschase’s prophecies of three world wars were coming to pass.

Chief Papaschase was a Cree First Nations Chief who lived in both the Lesser Slave Lake and Edmonton areas of northern Alberta, Canada.

In the Edmonton Bulletin newspaper in 1906, Chief Papaschase told the editor of a vision he had of three world wars that had been given him by the Great Spirit.

The first World War would see Britian, France, Italy, Russia and the U.S. fighting against Germany, the Austro-Hungarian Empire and the Ottoman Empire.

The Second World War would see Britain, France, Russia, the U.S. and China fighting against Germany, Italy and Japan.

Back in the 1990s, George Milner a member of the City of Edmonton History and Archives Board was given the task of presenting Chief Papaschase’s descendants with a City of Edmonton recognition award for his contributions to the development of the City of Edmonton.

The award would be presented by Mr. Milner to Papaschase’s descendants at the City of Edmonton History and Archives Board’s Annual Historical Recognition Awards Dinner.

The Gladieu (also spelled Gladue) family of northern Alberta and northern Saskatchewan (who were all descended from the great Chief Papaschase) had numerous representatives on hand at the dinner to receive the award on behalf of their ancestor.

While researching the life of Chief Papaschase for the speech he was to give, Mr. Milner was startled to discover in a copy of the Edmonton Bulletin newspaper from 1906 a description of the vision of three world wars that Chief Papaschase gave to Edmonton Bulletin editor Frank Oliver of a revelation he said he had received from the Great Spirit.

Mr. Milner was stunned by the sheer accuracy of the prophecies of the two world wars.

Unlike Nostradamus (or as a former DARPA employee called the writer of confused and confusing quatrains Nostril Dumb Ass), Chief Papaschase named names and didn’t equivocate.

Mr. Milner alluded to the prophecies in his dinner speech very briefly as he didn’t want the sensation of the vision to obscure Chief Papaschase’s other achievements in northern Alberta history.

As for the vision of the Third World War, Mr. Milner told the vision to his son.

The Third World War, Chief Papaschase noted would begin initially as a war of trade, technology and industrial espionage with China and Russia on one side vs. the U.S., Western Europe and Japan on the other.

Then admist a backdrop of tensions in the Crimean Peninsula on the Black Sea and religious and political tensions in the Middle East, the trade and technology war between the U.S. and China would suddenly erupt into open hostility and military conflict and warfare as a result of an incident that happened on Canada’s West Coast.

Papaschase did not say what that incident would be.

However with the recent arrest of Huawei Chief Financial Officer Meng Wanzhu in Vancouver, British Columbia while conflict in the Crimean Peninsula region of the Black Sea and religious and poltical tensions in the Middle East were reaching a crescendo it suddenly hit George Milner’s son that this may have been the scenario that Chief Papaschase saw prior to the outbreak of the military aspect of World War III.

Which may also explain why George Milner’s son has had such immense problems with demonically possessed roommates the past year and an inoperative iPhone and a gradually failing Samsung Galaxy tablet the past couple of months (as well as Fascism, Communism and all around totalitarianism on the part of the Calgary Public Library system) as he is probably one of the few human beings on Earth aware of the prophecies made by Chief Papaschase back in 1906.

As Renfield and Ho set out to poison Apple’s Cook with poisoned apples picked from the Russian Apple Tree of Death in Sevastopol Crimea (a tree genetically developed by Dr. Nicht Werhoffen the chief scientist of the Russian FSB who used to be the chief scientist for the East German Stasi back in the days when Communist East Germany existed as a country), British Prime Minister Theresa May stood in the Westminster House of Commons and announced that she was cancelling tomorrow’s Commons vote on her Brexit deal.

Ostensibly because she was going to lose the vote.

But also because Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II was anxious to find out what Renfield’s position on the deal was and Renfield was out of the country trying to save Canada’s national political sovereignty from the Trump Administration of the U.S.

Meanwhile in Jerusalem Israel, the Mossad agent they called the Controller of the Golem stood on the Temple Mount watching kohanim (priestly members) of Israel’s nascent Sanhedrin dedicate a stone altar to the Third Temple in Jersualem on the Temple Mount.

They were doing it today December 10th (which is the last day of Hannukah this year).

Meanwhile the ghost of Thomas Merton (the famous 20th Century American Trappist monk, writer, poet and mystic who had died 50 years ago today as a result of accidental electrocution by a Hitachi floor fan in his Bangkok Thailand retreat center room where he was attending an ecumenical monastic conference and dialogue between Catholic and Buddhist monks although Episcopalian (and former Dominican priest) Matthew Fox made the claim in 2016 that Merton was actually assassinated by the American CIA) had been granted temporary dispensational leave from Purgatory and Paradise by Hades the god of the Underworld (since Pope Francis was currently out to lunch as he had been since the start of his pontificate) to attend the dedication ceremony.

As Merton stood there, he was shocked to see the demons Baphomet and Beelzebub standing to the left of the Third Temple stone altar dedication ceremony.

What, Merton wondered, were they doing there?

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Monday December 10th
2018.

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Reblog of Kraken Skatin’ In Tel Aviv

December 9, 2018 at 9:34 pm (Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, Romance, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

A vampire novel chapter I wrote over 3 years ago called Kraken Skatin’ In Tel Aviv- featuring two characters who have recently come back into my vampire novel after a long absence- the Kraken who calls himself Napoleon VI and Medusa the ex-Gorgon.

Dracul Van Helsing

Kraken Skatin’ In Tel Aviv

The cyborg octopus Kraken who called himself Napoleon VI (he had been Italian sanity challenged scientist Dr. Poseidon Prometheus prior to uploading his consciousness into the body of the cyborg/octopus he had prepared in his lab) stepped on to the shore of Tel Aviv, Israel.

Medusa (the former gorgon who had finally got rid of her snaky hairstyle thanks to Dr. Cadbury Rocher’s robotic barber that he had invented) walked on water and then on to the shore wearing a beautiful aquamarine blue evening dress.

“Jesus Christ!” shouted an American Southern Baptist minister who was suntanning on the beach, “do you see that beautiful woman who can walk on water?”.

As the Baptist minister wrestled with himself over the most pressing theological question on his mind at the moment- whether or not masturbation was a sin- he failed to take notice of the Kraken who…

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Reptilian On The Temple Mount

December 16, 2017 at 9:53 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , )

Reptilian On The Temple Mount

The Mossad agent they call the Controller of The Golem was in his Jerusalem office when one of his aides entered the office.

“Sir, minutes ago a UFO was spotted above the Temple Mount and now an ET has been seen walking around the Temple Mount,” said the aide.

“An ET?” The Controller ran his fingers through his hair, “Is it an ET gray?”.

“No, sir,” the aide shook his head, “It’s a reptilian.”

“A reptilian?” The Controller turned white, “Those are nasty motherfuckers.”

“Indeed, sir,” the aide agreed, “that’s why agents at the location have given it the code name Oedipus.”

“Tell them I’ll be there as soon as possible,” the Controller realized that his corned beef sandwich would have to wait.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Saturday December 16th
2017.

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The Creature From Outer Space

December 9, 2016 at 4:52 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

The Creature From Outer Space

The creature from outer space who had arrived on Earth on Pearl Harbor Day was now staying in a 5-star hotel in Jerusalem. He had a room with an excellent view of the Temple Mount.

He was feeling somewhat famished after his long journey across the universe.

God (and also the Devil) knows he wasn’t as young as he used to be, the billions of years old creature thought to himself.

Yep, he was hungry all right.

But what he liked to eat would probably draw attention to himself if he went out.

So he decided to order in.

After sitting at a computer and hacking his way into a Cayman Islands bank account, he made a billion dollar donation to the Clinton Foundation.

In return, Planned Parenthood (one of Hillary’s biggest supporters) flew in a bunch of aborted foetuses and special delivered them to the demonic creature’s room for him to eat.

After eating 33 score and six foetuses, the demonic creature burped contentedly and went on to his next order of business- destroying some Muslim mosques that sat inconsiderately on top of the Temple Mount.

Whoever was now the owner of Solomon’s Ring had summoned him from his place at the far edges of the Universe to come and rebuild Solomon’s Temple.

Trouble is that there were currently Muslim mosques sitting atop the site so they’d have to be gotten rid of.

What was the signal sent out into space at lesser demonic speed to summon him to Earth to start rebuilding Solomon’s Temple?

It was what Howard Cosell might have called The Blasphemy On The Basilica had he still been alive.

For on December 8th (the Feast of the Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary) 2015, a New Age light show worshipping the goddess known as Gaia and showing a bunch of demonically possessed looking animals had been cast on to the pillars of Saint Peter’s Basilica to mark the beginning of Pope Francis’ Jubilee Year of Mercy.

Now the Jubilee Year of Mercy was over.

And the period of an unusual form of Justice was about to begin.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday December 8th
2016.

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The 75th Anniversary of Pearl Harbor

December 7, 2016 at 5:45 pm (Commentary, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , )

The 75th Anniversary of Pearl Harbor

A minute of silence was held to commemorate the 75th Anniversary of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor.

As U.S. President Barack Obama paid tribute to the over 2,400 people who died in the attack, an unseen visitor stood watching.

An hour earlier, an explosion had occurred in a far distant part of the universe.

An object had moved at an incredible speed from the impact of the explosion. It travelled trillions and trillions and trillions of times faster than the speed of light.

The object had arrived at the blue planet known as Earth within an hour.

It then turned into an entity bald and nude. Its hands were reptilian claws and its feet were amphibian webbed.

At least, that’s what it looked like if anyone could see it.

It stood and watched at the minute of silence to commemorate the 75th Anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor.

“A date which will live in infamy” is how President Franklin Delano Roosevelt described December 7th 1941 the day of the attack on Pearl Harbor.

If the entity that stood there understood anything about the nature of time, it might have appreciated the irony of those remarks.

For December 7th 2016 marked another Day of Infamy- or at least the start of a new Celestial Infamy.

December 7th 2016- TIME Magazine announces its choice of Donald Trump as Person of The Year.

December 7th 2016- Matteo Renzi announces his resignation as Prime Minister of Italy paving the way for new leadership in Rome- indeed a New Era for Rome.

December 7th 2016- Pope Francis laments the state of the world.

December 7th 2016- Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan dreams of becoming the new Sultan of a reborn Ottoman Empire as he sleeps.

December 7th 2016- Russian President Vladimir Putin dreams of becoming the 1st Byzantine Emperor in almost 600 years with his capital at Constantinople as he sleeps.

December 7th 2016- The entity leaves Pearl Harbor and zooms off to its destined target- the Temple Mount in Jerusalem.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Wednesday December 7th
2016.

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A Night At The Observatory

October 5, 2015 at 7:48 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, News, Religion, Science, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , )

A Night At The Observatory

At the Palomar Astronomical Observatory in Southern California, astronomer Dr. Balthasar Tannenbaum was looking through one of the telescopes.

He suddenly stopped in his tracks when he noticed something unusual flying through the heavens.

The object looked like images one saw of UFOs.

Yet the object was as clear as day (or at least as clear as this night was) .

There also seemed to be lights flashing on the UFO.

Dr. Balthasar Tannenbaum, who had a background in U.S. Naval Intelligence, recognized the pattern in the flashing of the lights as a type of Morse code.

He quickly grabbed a pencil and paper and jotted down the message sent to him by the UFO in deep space.

When he had finished, the message read, ADONAI Was Not Who He Claimed To Be.

Adonai?

Dr. Balthasar Tannenbaum bit the eraser at the end of his pencil.

Wasn’t that one of the Hebrew names for God? he asked himself.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Sunday October 4th
2015.

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Qonzilqointec Reads Report On Kraken and Medusa

September 10, 2015 at 5:33 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Espionage, International Intrigue, Mythology, News, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Qonzilqointec Reads Report On Kraken and Medusa

The Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec sat in her silk nightgown and read an email she had received from an MI-6 Agent whose code name was Diablos Nocturna.

She had never met Diablos Nocturna in person but the two had met on-line and had discovered they both had a mutual enemy.

They agreed to share information.

Diablos had sent her a copy of a report that he had received from an Israeli Mossad agent whose code name was The Controller of The Golem.

The report chronicled the movements of a Kraken sized octopus who was skateboarding across the state of Israel.

At his side as he skateboarded across Israel was a beautiful long haired redheaded woman who always wore the most elegant evening dresses and who had the ability to glide inches above the ground as she walked.

The Kraken and the redhead were first spotted at a global courier delivery service in downtown Tel Aviv where the woman arranged to have a dozen shopping bags couriered to her penthouse apartment in London.

They then went up to the Sea of Galilee at the woman’s insistence so that she could walk on water up there.

“I’m giving these people something they haven’t seen in 2000 years,” she said to the Kraken as tourists hastily took pictures with their smart phones.

A divinity professor at Yale who thought all of Christ’s miracles were strictly symbolic and that nobody could actually walk on water died of a heart attack when his daughter emailed him the picture.

He couldn’t fathom the thought of having to revise all his theories and revise all those textbooks he had written.

They then went to Cana of Galilee where the Kraken, wanting to upstage the redhead’s miracle of walking on water, tried to turn pitchers of water into lager beer at an American biker’s outdoor motorcycle wedding.

When the attempted miracle failed abysmally, the Kraken found himself being pursued by a group of angry tattooed motorcycle gang members and their equally angry tattooed brides.

The redhead who called herself Medusa had wisely ascended into the sky and headed off to Jerusalem before the Kraken had even attempted his water into beer wedding miracle.

She had recently seen the Kraken attempt to pull a rabbit out of a silk hat at a Mafia wedding in Sicily and when he had pulled out the local Mafia don’s mistress’ personally monogrammed panties instead, that had not gone over so well.

The Kraken jumped on his skateboard and headed out of town just before sunset as the Hell’s Angels followed on hot pursuit on their motorcycles.

“I don’t recall this ever happening in Lady Gaga’s music video about Judas,” were the Kraken’s last words as he skated past the sign that said You Are Now Leaving Cana of Galilee.

. . .

The redheaded Medusa’s descent on to the Temple Mount on August 27th 2015 (on the 40th Anniversary of Ethiopian Emperor Haile Selassie’s death in Addis Ababa) frightened away both Orthodox Jewish wailer at the Western Wall and Muslim worshipper on the Temple Mount alike paving the way for the Kraken who called himself Napoleon VI to skateboard on to the Temple Mount on his skateboard bearing the image of former Rastafarian Bob Marley.

The report from the Controller of the Golem that Qonzilqointec was reading bore the notation that the Controller had been immediately summoned by the Office of the Prime Minister of Israel Benjamin Netanyahu to report immediately to a West Jerusalem police station to take a sobriety test.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
Thursday August 27th
2015.

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Kraken Skatin’ In Tel Aviv

August 18, 2015 at 7:16 pm (Geopolitics and International Relations, International Intrigue, Mythology, Science-Fiction, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

Kraken Skatin’ In Tel Aviv

The cyborg octopus Kraken who called himself Napoleon VI (he had been Italian sanity challenged scientist Dr. Poseidon Prometheus prior to uploading his consciousness into the body of the cyborg/octopus he had prepared in his lab) stepped on to the shore of Tel Aviv, Israel.

Medusa (the former gorgon who had finally got rid of her snaky hairstyle thanks to Dr. Cadbury Rocher’s robotic barber that he had invented) walked on water and then on to the shore wearing a beautiful aquamarine blue evening dress.

“Jesus Christ!” shouted an American Southern Baptist minister who was suntanning on the beach, “do you see that beautiful woman who can walk on water?”.

As the Baptist minister wrestled with himself over the most pressing theological question on his mind at the moment- whether or not masturbation was a sin- he failed to take notice of the Kraken who was helping himself to an 8 armsload of kosher hot dogs from a kosher hot dogs vendor on the beach.

The protesting kosher hots dog vendor found himself lifted and thrown into the water by one of the Kraken’s robotic metallic hook tentacles.

“What a pain in the ass!” The vendor shouted as the salt water licked the wounds of the spot where the metallic hooked tentacles had grabbed him.

Having eaten and then belched and then scratching his stomach (thankful that he no longer had to wear a belt), the Kraken headed off the beach and off in the direction of downtown Tel Aviv.

“Where are you going?” Medusa floated in the air alongside him.

“Finding myself a skateboard park,” said the Kraken, “I want to learn how to skateboard.”

“Okay,” said Medusa, “I hope you don’t mind if I spend some time shopping in Tel Aviv’s fashion district.”

“No, go ahead,” the Kraken shrugged his tentacles.

Unlike the former Bruce Jenner, Napoleon VI was one guy who didn’t really enjoy shopping for women’s clothing.

Napoleon VI had decided while doing the backstroke across the Mediterranean to go to Tel Aviv to learn to skateboard.

The reason? He felt compelled to go to the Temple Mount in Jerusalem for some reason.

An inner voice told him that there was a cavern underneath the Temple Mount that led to an underground sea deep under the mountain.

This underground sea stretched far and wide and connected with the currently underwater Garden of Eden at the head of the Persian Gulf where the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers flow into the sea.

The Kraken resolved to go to Jerusalem, go up the Temple Mount, find the underground cavern leading to the underground sea, swim to the undersea Garden of Eden, strangle the Cherubim sentinels with his robotic metallic hooked tentacles, and use the memory of his martial arts skills to use his 8 arms to do battle with the flaming sword that turned every which way while guarding the Tree of Life.

He would then eat the fruit of the Tree of Life so that he could live forever.

A back-up plan just on the off-chance that the Transhumanist scientific theories he subscribed to that he could make himself immortal by uploading his consciousness into a cyborg/ biological creature hybrid turned out to be wrong.

Of course for a great scientific genius like himself, he knew that was virtually impossible.

Still that one question about ethics in the practice of science on his final year of Undergraduate exams at Cambridge University had really tripped him up.

It blew his chances of getting a perfect score on that test.

So he realized it was better to be safe than dead.

Hence his desire to use the Jerusalem Temple Mount underground corridor to use the underground sea to reach the underwater Garden of Eden and eat of the fruit of the Tree of Life so he could live forever.

Just as California mass murderer Charles Manson believed that the Beatles’ song Helter Skelter was a prophecy of a coming race war in the United States (which may finally be coming true in 2015 thanks to trigger happy cops), so the Kraken Napoleon VI believed that the Beatles’ song An Octopus’ Garden In The Shade was a prophecy of his (the Kraken’s) finding the Garden of Eden under the sea.

So what did any of this have to do with his desire to learn to skateboard?

Well, the thought occurred to him that when he landed on the beaches of Tel Aviv, people might become suspicious if they noticed an 8 armed octopus with robotic metallic hooks on its tentacles walk from Tel Aviv to the Temple Mount in Jerusalem.

They probably wouldn’t be as suspicious of Medusa now that she no longer sported snakes for curls in her hair.

Of course Medusa being a witch did have the power to glide inches above water and inches above the ground.

Still most Israelis would probably just think she was a woman who had successfully mastered Maharishi Mahesh Yogi’s Transcendental Meditation technique of yogic flying, the Kraken reflected, as the Beatles song The Fool On The Hill played from the radio of a Tel Aviv Chinese grocery store he passed on the street.

After all if a rock and roll slut like Madonna could claim to be a practitioner of Kabbalah, then surely an ex-Gorgon could be accepted as a yogic flying adept?

As for himself, the Kraken Napoleon VI figured that if he skateboarded all the way from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem’s Temple Mount, he wouldn’t be mistaken for such an oddity.

The Kraken found a Tel Aviv skateboard park.

The park was instantly cleared of hundreds of skateboarders for some reason when the 8 armed giant cyborg octopus Kraken made his appearance on the concrete.

One long haired heavy metal singer headbanger looking skateboarder who had fallen off his skateboard when the Kraken made his appearance was still lying dazed on the pavement when Napoleon VI pointed one of his cyborg hooked tentacle arms at him, “You.”

“Please,” the skateboarder pleaded, “I gave at the office.”

“And I gave at the sexually transmitted diseases clinic when I was human,” the Kraken shook his head, “I want you to teach me how to skateboard.”

One thing the skateboarder had learned in his young life was when an 8 armed octopus with metallic robotic hooks on his tentacles asks you to teach him how to skateboard, you don’t argue.

Within a couple of hours, the cyborg octopus Kraken had turned into a master skateboarder the same way an expert fisherman who spends his nights alone on a fishing boat turns into a master baiter.

Having completed his lesson, the Kraken grabbed the young headbanger’s skateboard and thanking him for both the lesson and the skateboard, he doffed his Napoleon Bonaparte style hat to him and bid him adieu.

“You’re welcome,” the young skateboarder supposed he should be grateful that he got away with his life intact but still, he reflected, that had been a darn expensive skateboard.

A Hezbollah suicide bomber (who had arrived in Tel Aviv clandestinely by sea on the orders of Barack Obama’s new bosom bum buddies the despotic mullahs of Iran) blew himself up prematurely when he saw the 8 armed cyborg octopus Kraken with metallic robotic hooks on his tentacles skate by on his skateboard that bore the image of reggae singer Bob Marley.

The Islamist terrorist was thus the only casualty of his premature detonation.

The skateboarding Kraken caught up with the beautiful Medusa just as she was leaving one of Tel Aviv’s most exclusive ladies’ fashion stores.

She was carrying dozens of shopping bags.

“Here carry these for me, will you,” she threw the shopping bags into the Kraken’s 8 arms as she started to glide above the ground.

“Me?” The Kraken almost fell off his skateboard under the weight of all those shopping bags.

“Well,” Medusa reached into her Gucci purse and brought out a compact mirror and hairbrush and started brushing her lovely snakeless hair, “you’ve got 8 arms, I’ve only got two.”

“How am I suppose to maneuver on this skateboard carrying all these bags all the way to the Temple Mount in Jerusalem?” The Kraken demanded to know.

“I’m sure you’ll find a way to manage,” Medusa pressed her fingers to her lips in thoughtful contemplation, “I wonder if I should pick up a few extra pairs of pantyhose?”.

“I hope we don’t get spotted by any other Krakens on the way there,” Napoleon VI sighed, “otherwise they’re going to think I’m a real sissy.”

To be continued.

-A vampire novel chapter
written by Christopher
during the period
August 1st to 17th
2015.

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Phoenix On The Temple Mount On The 9th of Av

July 25, 2015 at 8:55 pm (Commentary, Culture, Folklore, Geopolitics and International Relations, History, Mythology, News, Poetry, The Supernatural, Vampire novel) (, , , , , , , , , )

Phoenix On The Temple Mount On The 9th of Av

A Phoenix unseen to the human eye
seen only by those with spiritual vision
this Phoenix lived a happy life on Mount Fuji, Japan
but now was its time to die
It would return to its rocky home in the sands of Arabia
Build itself a pyre nest of aromatic branches
and then cover it with the spice of myrrh
Then throw on some frankincense
and set it on fire
And then consume itself in the flames.
So like the salmon returning to the streams of its birth in British Columbia in order to spawn, so the Phoenix would return to the sands of its birth in Arabia in order to die.
The Phoenix sang a happy song as it flew west
away from its adopted land of the rising sun
to a land far closer to the setting sun
as it neared the sunset of its own life
A song as sung by one expectant to reach Paradise
It was flying home to its terrestrial home
to serve as the gate of entry to its celestial home
As it neared the Arabian Peninsula, it wept tears of joy
but those watery eyes would soon be overcome by rings of smoke
caused by the fires of war burning below
and those tears of joy turned to tears of mourning as it noticed its rocky home had been destroyed by missiles
caused by the bloodbath whose whirlpools flowed between Yemeni Houthi rebel and Saudi soldier
It flew further west still
searching for a new place to die
The Bird of Paradise
overcome by the visions of Tartarus playing out on the surface of the earth below
It flew until it could fly no more
Its heart tried to keep beating until it could beat no more
its song of joy a distant tune whose melody was rapidly being forgotten
The bird dropped down
and down
and down
And fell on top of the Temple Mount in Jerusalem
on this 9th of Av in the Hebrew lunar year 5775
The Gregorian solar calendar date of July 25th 2015.
For one brief shining moment
this beautiful rainbow coloured feather giant bird
stood proudly up on its feet
spread its wings
and sang out its cry
a cry of despair across the universal sky
Tears of blood fell from its eyes
and poured down its body
and then it fell to the ground
and died.
No human eye could see the fierce fire that burned on the Temple Mount.

-A narrative free verse poem
written by Christopher
Saturday July 25th
2015.

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